Famous among dozens
1. I was reading a New Yorker article about an entomologist who used to roll her hair up in the car window when she was driving while sleepy so that her hair would jerk her awake if she fell asleep at the wheel.
2. Alice’s correspondence with age Four and a Half will hurt you with its brilliance. Read it, and do not stop until you get to the bit about Obi-Wan Kenobi.
I’m three months pregnant, and my 9-year-old nephew and I discuss baby names:
Trevor: What will you name it if it’s a boy?
Me: Maybe Hank.
Trevor: Hank Aaron had more home runs than anyone else.
Me: Really?
Trevor: He was MVP in 1957.
Me: I didn’t know that.
Trevor: He was also black at the time.
Bryan: I know you’re hungry, little baby, so you’ll want to get your hands out of the way. Stop pushing the bottle away, little guy.
Me: (cooing voice) Who doesn’t know what hands are yet? Whooo doesn’t understand the basic principles of physics? Whooo?
Bryan: Who jerks around like he has some sort of grave neurological disorder? Whoooo?
Both: It’s Henry! It’s Heeeenry!
I just splashed water on my face without removing my glasses, and moments later I tried to eat the pen in my left hand while holding a banana in my right.
“You know what I haven’t seen in awhile?” I say to Bryan. “Fight Club. I love that movie. Let’s rent it.” Bryan heads to the video store and returns with the movie. As we’re watching, I realize that momhood has ushered in a new era of overreaction to bloody images.
Me: Whoa! Oooooo.
Bryan: …
Me: Jeez! JEEZ!
Bryan: …
Me: This is violent.
Bryan: It’s not called Cuddle Club.
Bryan: I voted for American Idol last night.
Me: You did?
Bryan: Yep.
Me: Our world is shrinking.
Bryan: Yep.
Me: Who’d you vote for?
Bryan: Young Indian guy and big curly haired guy.
Me:… Well played.
Last night I dreamt that a bald man was chasing me, intent on slaughtering me for cannibalistic purposes.
In a desperate bid for more television hours to fill our depleted Tivo, I record a show called Yummy Mummy. They’re doing a makeover segment on a mom who collects holiday sweaters.
Mom: And this is a Christmas sweater! But I wear it throughout the winter because it’s a nice wintry scene.
Me: Stop it.
Mom: And this is my Halloween sweater.
Me: Stop it… Stop.
Mom: This is my Valentine’s Day sweater, with all the hearts.
Me: Stop it.
Bryan: She can’t hear you.
Me:…
Mom: And this is another Christmas sweater.
Me: …
Mom: And I even have all the jewelry to match!
Me: Stop it.
Bryan: Maybe you should watch something else.
Henry Martin Mason, originally uploaded by MaggieMason.
Hey everybody, we had a baby! A tiny, pink baby!
His name is Henry Martin Mason, but you can call him Hank.
I went into labor February 11 at 2 a.m., and he was born around noon that day — 8 lbs. 2 oz., and 21 inches long. I had a really good labor, and as you can see, he’s pretty much the sweetest baby ever.
I’ll tell you more later, after we’re a little less dazed. For now, thanks for all the happy wishes and strong support throughout my pregnancy. I can’t tell you how much I’ve appreciated you guys in the past few months.
Hank is one exceptional baby, and I wish you could snuggle him. He even smells soft.
Heather just sent me a link to a very amusing countdown ticker site. I wish I’d had this all along. Anyway, you’ll find my ticker at the bottom of the page.
Mighty Girl 