My Lovely Lady Lumps

Today I ordered an S-Factor DVD, as pregnant stripping is wildly hilarious.

Suspense, Killing Me

Oh my, but this cracks me up. Yet another sign that I’m going to be an excellent mother.

Color

From the folks who brought you the magical San Francisco bouncy ball commercial (scroll down to download), here’s a breathtaking exploding paint commercial. I could do without the creepy clown moment, but still.

Joke Club

I have a joke up over at Josh A. Cagan’s Joke Club (scroll down until you see my photo). Mr. Cagan is an official NaBloPoMo participant, which means a solid month of hilarious posts from the Cagan household. Go read them.

Here’s, the joke he didn’t use:

Kevin Federline reportedly wrote a nasty message to his ex-wife Britney Spears on the shower door of his dressing room at the House of Blues in Chicago. The message was scrawled in permanent marker, which begs the question, where did he get opposable thumbs?

Emma for President

I tell my niece about a toy called Webkinz, which is sort of like a cross between a Cabbage Patch Kid and a Tamagotchi.

Me: You go online to adopt it, and then you feed it and take care of it.

Emma: Oooo! I like controlling things.

Two Things in Other Places

1. Megan, Will You Be My Mom? or Amazing Spider Cakes and Knitted Wig

Oops. Didn’t realize this was set for private viewing only.2. Portrait of Dorian Champ or Heather Never Ages

3. Where’s My X-Acto Knife? or Sigh-Worthy Paper Cuts

Cold Storage

Melissa of the excellent Suburban Bliss just did her first No One Cares What You Had for Lunch post. Turns out that the outside of her refrigerator is a frickin’ time capsule. And you? Pony up, kids. What’s on your fridge?

Put links to your refrigerator images or lists in the comments, and I’ll leave them open until the spammers close in. Maybe we’ll even do a Best of Fridges roundup.

He Already Called His Mom

Heather just wrote a hilarious post,“Having Dated Walking Red Flags” inspired by one of the ideas in No One Cares What You Had for Lunch: 100 Ideas for Your Blog. If you’re wondering what kinds of ideas are in my book, go have a read. And don’t skip Heather’s comments, they’re enlightening.

Treading Lightly

In case you haven’t been watching MTV lately, or in case you just want to watch this again and again until you can perform your own routine at the gym, here’s the OK Go, “Here It Goes Again” video.

Woot

No One Cares What You Had for Lunch went to press today! I spent the day with my editor scrubbing the proofs. It should be ready around August 10, so expect your copies shortly after that. Thank you for all the kind words and the support. I can’t wait to read your shiny new posts.