For almost an entire year, you never once worry about sucking in your gut. Your gut is adorable! If you make any effort whatsoever to be presentable (say, applying lipstick and avoiding sweatpants) people exclaim over how you seem to be glowing. You’re adorable!
You fantasize about reclaiming your high-school figure once the baby is born. You can do this without a moment’s guilt for not heading straight to the gym. “In a few months, I will reclaim my high-school figure!” you think to yourself triumphantly.
You know what sounds good? Cookies.