Famous among dozens
I am asleep and having a sex dream. It is Girls-Gone-Wild-esque, save one key element. Everyone in the dream, including me, is a mathematician.
I am amongst a handful of bikini-clad girls standing atop a boat. We are laughing and holding small white boards. The guys in the crowd are raising their beer bottles and screaming, “Show us your solutions! Show us your solutions!”
As we’re leaving the car rental place, a guy at the gate stops us. He nods and hands Bryan a large clipboard with a form to sign. Taped to the bottom of the clipboard are two photos. One is of gate guy holding a giant sea skate and grinning, and the other is a woman in soft focus. She is slightly overweight, her hair has been recently curled, and she is busy seducing the camera. Her lips slightly parted, her eyes uncomfortably intimate.
“Uh, where do I sign?” Bryan asks. The gate guy touches his pen to a line that is just left of his girlfriend’s ample cleavage.
“Thanks.” Bryan says, and we drive away.
We’re at a panel where Jason Fried is talking about “building small.” Nothing too complex. Reduce the feature set as much as possible. Build as little as you can.
I turn around in my seat, and whisper to Amy:
-Behold! I have built�nothing.
-Ha! Someone just sent me that exact message over IM.
-Hive mind. (Adopting robot voice.) I-like-your-glass-es.
-I-en-joy-your-graph-ic-tee.
-Where-did-you-find-those-awe-some-Cam-pers?
A highlight from Merlin’s 5ives:
“Five things you can bring along to help make the party all about you
A highlight from Merlin’s 5ives:
“Five things you can bring along to help make the party all about you
1. your doggie
2. your 12-string
3. your new Nikon
4. your puppet friend
5. Dianetics”
I’m tutoring in an elementary school classroom, and reading timelines the students have created. My favorite:
Election
Oaklahoma City Bombing
Iraq
Trade Center
My no-good, rotten, makes a big deal out of everything sister is born.
Say you wake up, and it’s still dark, and you’re groggy, and you’re thirsty.
Say you stumble into the kitchen, and you see the silhouette of a container of cranberry juice on the counter. Say you’re sleepy, so you don’t stop to think about why it’s not in the fridge, or why the cap feels funny.
In that situation, my advice for you is not to drink it. It’s probably olive oil.
As you may know, I rarely do this stuff. For some reason, it makes me feel cagey. But Heather so rarely asks for anything. When she does, you kind of have to do what she says. So, this is for you, sweets.
Four jobs I’ve had:
Bead store clerk
Silkscreen shop owner
Dance instructor
Volunteer coordinator, Kerry Campaign, DNC
Four Movies I can watch over and over:
Amelie
Godfather II
Gilda
Say Anything
Four Places I’ve Lived:
California my whole life, except for a month each in:
Costa Rica
London
Boston
Four TV shows I love:
Veronica Mars
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
I Shouldn’t Be Alive
Myth Busters
Four places I’ve vacationed:
Jamaica
Malaysia
The Phillipines
Australia
Four of my favorite dishes:
Steak
Lemon blueberry pancakes
Fried potatoes with bacon and wilted spinach
Creme Brulee
Four sites I visit daily:
Four places I would rather be right now:
On the Giant Dipper at the Santa Cruz Boardwalk
In a dark room with a Christmas tree that has white, blinking lights.
Tucking in to breakfast at Zazie.
Swimming.
Four bloggers I’m tagging/slightly alienating:
Bryan who has to love me by law.
Sarah deserves a healthy prompting.
Andrea who is good at introspection.
Lori who is always game.
-Open containers aren’t a big deal, smoking pot isn’t really a problem, no one gets upset about prostituion. Is anything actually illegal here?
-Violence.
-Parking.
Bad Girls by Subcategory
Originally uploaded by MaggieMason.
Biker Babes, Teen Sluts, Hookers, Ball Breakers, Bad Seeds…
Mighty Girl 