Fact

So I read here that the conga line is a dance developed by slaves who were shackled together. I sort of wish I didn’t know that.

(And so I share it with you.)

In the Running

Hey! I got nominated for a Bloggie for best tagline. I found out when I read it on Josh’s website. Anyway, a big thank you to whoever nominated me. Sally forth, my tens and tens of readers; vote like people who enjoy my tagline! I heart winning things.

Saturday Night

Music: YOU DOWN WITH OPP? YEAH YOU KNOW ME!

L: What does that mean?

Me: What?

L: What does that even mean?

Me: It means, “Say, do you feel that OPP accurately represents your worldview, resulting in an increased respect for, and loyalty to, him and what he represents?”

L:What?

M: And then the other guy says, “Why yes, you’re well-acquainted with my fealty for said musician. In fact, this entire party feels the same way.”

L:…You’re drunk.

Monkeys!

In researching charities for a Morning News article, I came across this site. It’s a charity that, I shit you not, trains monkeys to help quadriplegics. Could this rock any more? At first the idea seemed so weirdly revolutionary that I thought it couldn’t be for real. Tell me that the logo, the tagline (“Monkey helpers for the disabled”), and those grainy photos don’t make it look like a very well-conceived spoof? But it’s not. These are real, live monkey helpers, and this is the best idea anyone has had in a long time. Why, oh why, aren’t they selling T-shirts with just the logo on the front? I’d buy three.

Leader

The news that Bush planned his war with Iraq a few days after inauguration has me upset. Plato, who is smarter than me, says this:

“When the tyrant has disposed of foreign enemies by conquest or treaty, and there is nothing to fear from them, then he is always stirring up some war or other, in order that the people may require a leader.”

Diction

The lead of this article reads:

“A Boynton Beach music teacher seduced one of her 11-year-old students and carried on a 19-month sexual relationship with him until the boy’s stepmother stumbled upon evidence of their escapades Tuesday, authorities said.”

Does anyone else think the word “seduced” is an odd choice in describing the ongoing molestation of an eleven-year-old boy?

Too Bad

Bryan: Green Bay got knocked out. They’re not going to the Super Bowl.

Me: Oh no! We wanted Green Bay to go to the Superbowl.

B: Yeah.

Me: I’m sorry!

B: I don’t know about that.

Me: What?

B: Your tone. I think you’re mocking me.

Me: No. I just don’t know the appropriate level of concern to express about one’s team not making it to the Super Bowl. It hasn’t come up before.

B: Oh. Well it’s kind of like you seeing Pamela Anderson on the cover of Jane again. Not a huge deal, but just… too bad.