Category: My Life

Painting as a Pastime by Winston Churchill

The best parts of Winston Churchill’s Painting as a Pastime*:

On libraries:
“As you browse about, taking down book after book from the shelves and contemplating the vast, infinitely varied store of knowledge and wisdom which the human race has accumulated and preserved, pride, even in its most innocent forms, is chased from the heart by feelings of awe not untinged with sadness. As on surves the mighty array of sages, saints, historians, scientists, poets and philosophers whose treaures ne will never be able to admire — still less enjoy — the brief tenure of our existence here dominates mind and spirit.”

“It is a mistake to read too many good books when quite young… The first impression is the one that counts; and if it is a slight one, it may be all that can be hoped for.”

“The boy learns enough Latin to detest it; enough Greek to pass an examination; enough French to get from Calais to Paris; enough German to exhibit a diploma; enough Spanish or Italian to tell which is which; but not enough of any to secure the enormous boon of access to a second literature.”

“Just to paint is great fun. The colours are lovely to look at and delicious to squeeze out. Matching them, however crudely, with what you see is fascinating and absolutely absorbing. Try it if you have not done so — before you die.”

“One begins to see, for instance, that painting a picture is like fighting a battle; and trying to paint a picture is, I suppose, like trying to fight a battle. It is, if anything, more exciting than fighting it successfully.”

Hank the Photographer

A few days ago, Hank finally figured out how to use the viewfinder on a camera.

Ever since, he’s been crying when I won’t let him use my delicate, precious SLR.

So we hightailed got him his own kid-friendly digital camera, which he hasn’t put it down since. Seeing the world from his perspective has been awesome.

Monkey Robot Family

Hank asked to be a Monkey Robot for Halloween, so our work here is done.

Here is my child dressed as Everything That is Awesome. I based his robot panel on Arlo’s robot costume from a few years back, which is the work of my supermom designer friend Jen Robbins.

Bryan and I were thinking of going as mad scientists, until we hit upon the scheme of going as a robot and a monkey. This is my subdued girl-robot costume, with Blade Runner hair and mini-loaf tin shoulder pads.

The best part of the costume were the leg circuits. We drew them on with Crayola markers, then I put nylons over them.

I figured I’d just wear pants until they washed off, and then belatedly remembered we have fancy plans tonight. Le sigh. “Hello, I’m the girl with the sub-par tattoos.”

Bryan is a real natural in the role of monkey. It’s too bad we didn’t bring along any plastic poop for flinging, because I think that would have really made the costume. Next year.

More costume and Halloween photos on Flickr.

How to Keep Kids Happy While You’re Away

When we decided to take Hank to Ireland last minute, reader Lianne Raymond sent me a touching note offering some tips for keeping kids content while you’re away — whether you’re traveling or just dropping them off at daycare. Her ideas mirror a lot of my own philosophies about parenting, so I thought I’d share. Thanks, Lianne.

1) Acknowledge the child’s feelings.

Empathize with them. “I know, it’s hard to be apart, isn’t it?” And normalize their feelings. “Everybody feels a little bit scared when they go to a new place.” Let their attachment to you be a place they can rest in love in the midst of their anxiety.

Don’t minimize the child’s feelings or ask them to change how they feel. “Can you be a brave big boy for mummy?” Don’t try to change their feelings and behavior.

2) If the child is going to school or childcare, let them see you interact with the teacher or the caregiver in a positive way.

Children are naturally wired to be wary of strangers — for good reason. They will, however, take cues from those they love as to who is worthy of their trust. If they see you interacting with the teacher with smiles, nods, laughter and even a hug, if possible, they will be able to feel safer with that person. Not that they will bond immediately, the relationship will still need to be developed, but this provides a good footing.

3) Give the child an object through which they can feel connected to you while you are apart.

A scarf that smells like your favourite perfume. A locket with a picture of you and them inside. Matching bracelets that you both wear — these can be a simple as a coloured string — hey it works for Kabbalah peeps! Imbue the object with some magic powers, “When you open the locket invisible magic dust will come out and you will be able to see Mummy in your head and mummy will be able to see you in her head, and it will be just like we are together.” “There is an invisible string connecting our two bracelets and when you tug on your bracelet it will travel along the invisible string until it gets to me.”

4) Focus on the return

Don’t talk details about the separation, but give details about the reunion. “Oh, it’s going to be so wonderful when I come to pick you up. I’m going to give you the biggest hug and smother you in kisses. I’m going to be so happy to see you!”

5) Don’t avoid the goodbye

It’s very common for parents to try to sneak out of the house or away from the school and avoid dealing with the feelings of separation altogether. While understandable, it is much better to focus on developing emotionally healthy separation rituals then to leave the child feeling abandoned.

All excellent advice. Thanks again, Lianne. And what about you? Do you have any special rituals that keep you connected when you’re away from the kids in your life?

Fun Thing: Pacific Coast Air Museum

Ordinarily I wouldn’t recommend spending a day in a dusty field full of old machinery, but it’s kind of awesome when you have a three-year-old in tow. I think it’s the soundtrack.

Anyway, if you have a kid going through an airplane phase, the Pacific Coast Air Museum is a big hit. And afterward you can go wine tasting while your kid plays with a new toy airplane from the gift shop. High fives, team.

Pacific Coast Air Museum
2230 Becker Blvd.
Santa Rosa, CA 95403
707-575-7900

Wedding Guest Comfort

Whenever Bryan or I started freaking out about wedding planning, we would remind each other that it was just a big party. Our main thing was that we wanted everyone to have fun. Real fun, not “wedding fun.”

Here are a few of the things we did to make things a little more comfortable for guests:

-Instead of inviting all the out of town guests to the rehearsal dinner, we had cocktails with everyone the night before at our hotel. Everyone had an extra night to get to know one another, which made for more spectacular hookups the following night.

-In the church waiting area, we had two cork boards. One was pinned with rosemary boutonnieres(rosemary symbolizes friendship), and one pinned with hankies.

-We served cake (technically cupcakes) right before our first dance, and had sparklers on hand, so guests would have something to do while we took to the dance floor.

-We had a box of cheapo spa flipflops for when the heels got to be too much. I wore these half the night, and they facilitated much kid chasing.

-I can’t say enough about having comfort boxes in the bathroom. Seven years later, I’m still getting comments on ours, which had spray deodorant (so several people could use the same bottle), band aids for blisters, dental floss, toothpaste and single use tooth brushes, moisturizer, fashion tape, pads and tampons, safety pins, hair bands, bobby pins and barrettes, and combs (…and condoms).

-We let the crasher crash. He pretended he was French, we pretended we believed him. Be our guest, not-French-Guy!

-We situated our kids’ table between two adult tables, and seated parents at the surrounding tables with their backs to the kids. This made for easy intervention in the instance of fits, but some adult interaction when the kids were behaving. Excellent.

-We set up a web site with tips on how to enjoy the city.

-Two months after the wedding, we went through our photos and printed up the best one of each guest to send it as a holiday card. They were so much fun to put together, like a personalized wedding favor, and we still see our wedding photos pinned to friends’ fridges.

-We had a birthday cupcake waiting for my bridesmaid Trisha, who had put aside her own special day for ours. Trisha is awesome like that.

Happy Seventh Anniversary, Bryan Mason!

Dancing on our wedding day.

So, today is our wedding anniversary, Internet.

Bryan and I have been married lo these seven years, which I hear is very good luck. Right? Right! We’ve been together for nine years, which officially makes us saints. (Especially the me part of us. Trust me. I am the Mother Theresa of married chicks, but with shorter skirts and more tequila.)

Every so often, one of you emails asking about what happened at our wedding — what we wore, where it was, what we ate. You think you’re having trouble finding it on the site. Wrong! You’re sure that if you look hard enough, you’ll find my wedding day shoes and a full list of our readings. Not true!

The truth is, we were married about a year before everyone started sharing details of their weddings publicly. At the time, it was considered a little too personal, unless you happened to have eloped. This is because we are very, very old. (WHAM! Orbitz! What are roller blades? ) So I’ve decided that this week is the wedding tell all.

Are you getting married right now, you sweet young thing? Congratulations! Here’s yet another dose of the giant stash of wedding porn that is the Internet.

Happy anniversary, Bryan R. Mason. You continue to be a very nice young man, and I love you.