While we were at SxSW, Laura and I threw a Mobile Manners brunch with Intel. We gathered a group of very smart women to eat quiche and text one other about the irritating things people do with their gadgets.
Genevieve Bell, an Intel Fellow who studies how different cultures use technology, presented some of their mobile etiquette research.
During Genevieve’s presentation, I tweeted while she was talking (event hashtag, FTW), checked in to Foursquare, and texted with a person sitting two tables away from me. Afterward, I drove around town looking for a funeral parlor, because I’ve heard those are nice quiet places to make phone calls.
Everyone else was the picture of civility, even when the gift bags came out.
Now that’s some good home training.
The bags were a team effort amongst attendees, and as always we saved one for you. Maile brought her gorgeous Epiphanie Bags, and I set aside the Clover Laptop and Camera Bag in grey, which is the one I carry. Everywhere. And sometimes I spoon with it. It looks like this:
Elizabeth works for Twitter, but also has a letterpress business called Paperwheel Press. She brought everyone a couple of geeky letterpress thank you notes:
And finally, Intel threw in a copy of Emily Post’s Great Get Togethers:
To win, please leave your pinky out when you sip your tea, and leave your most profound mobile etiquette peeve in comments.
Please only enter once; I’ll leave comments open until Monday when I’ll announce the winner. I hope it’s you.
Mighty Girl 
Drives me crazy when I am having a conversation in person with someone and they have to stop and check the screen to see who just texted.
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I would have to say my pet peeve is any voicemail. If it’s important, text or email me…I can see that you called on my caller ID and will respond as soon as I can. Also, I loathe people who call just to chat (except for my sister)…I have other things to do! Wow, do I sound cranky!
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When you’re talking to someone (in a group or alone, doesn’t matter) and all of a sudden he answers his cell phone without even saying “Oh I have to take this”. Ugh!
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My biggest bugaboo is when people take a phone call whilst in the middle of an in-person conversation without excusing themselves.
I work retail, so I get this about once a day: someone asks about a product, and while I’m in the middle of explaining it to them, they take a call without a word to me.
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The loud cell phone talker … so annoying.
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When people text while riding their bike in front of me! They randomly change speed and trajectory making it impossible to get around.
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Phone calls on transit. About sex. At six a.m.
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People who answer the phone via their hands-free headset without warning, while in the middle of a conversation with me.
No. Just no – NO-ONE is that important.
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When people are riding public transit talking on the phone and usually yell some variation on the following:
“I’M ON THE BUS!”
“I’M ON THE SUBWAY!”
Yes, we know. 🙂
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Any dinner table with a phone at it is no good!!
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When people talk on their phones while going through the check out.
Rude to everyone around – the cashier ringing them up as well as the people in line behind them whom they’re holding up.
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does it count if mine is the same as someone else’s? When patrons answer their cell phone in the middle of a reference transaction.
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When people knock on my office door, and come in talking on their cellphone, interrupting my work and making me wait for them to finish a conversation they could have finished in the hall. Rude.
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Absolutely my number one techno peeve is people who don’t understand how to silence their phones! I was at a funeral two weeks ago and some sweet little old lady not only didn’t silence her phone (or leave it in the car!), but she couldn’t find it in her purse when it started ringing that unmistakable AT&T standard ringtone during the middle of the eulogy!
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I would like anyone that clips their fingernails in public to be given huge fines. It is just so rude and gross.
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It drives me nuts when people check email during meetings. I don’t bring my cell phone to meeting why can you bring your iPhone?
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When you e-mail someone a simple question, and they call you back because they didn’t want to have to go back and forth over e-mail. I’m pretty sure that what was what e-mail was invented for. To go back and forth…
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Mine has already been mentioned, but there’s nothing else that bothers me quite as much: talking or texting while checking out in a retail establishment. It is completely and totally disrespectful to the cashier who’s trying to help you. Most checkouts take under two minutes (and that’s generous), you can wait to return that text, ask your friend to hold, and even better yet–put the damn phone down!
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I hate when people have loud, inconsequential phone conversations in public. I still cringe when I think about the time my now-ex-husband (we were engaged at the time! Why did I not see that was a symptom of his overall assholish self-absorption???), who was extremely loud, had an inane conversation with his mom in the middle of a bead store. It was mortifying. That was…wow, over 10 yeas ago now.
I totally stick my pinky out when drinking tea. Because I’m a laaaaaydee.
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My biggest pet peeve is when my husband and I are relaxing in bed enjoying a lazy morning, and he reaches for his phone every time there is a lull in the conversation. We have recently instated a ban on cell phones in bed!
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Quite simply, I think it is rude to text others while you are talking to someone else in person. It seems as if people have forgotten the luxury of talking face to face. It makes me feel ignored. And you just KNOW that they are sending something incidental otherwise, it would be phone call!
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OMG. Wish I had been there. And yes, pick me to win!
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Biggest pet peeve: cell phone in the theater (movie or otherwise)…just seeing the stupid little screen light up distracts me. And texting or even answering (gahhh!) make me all indignant. Because I am that girl who shushes people during the show!
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I think that speakerphone is the ultimate rudest thing ever and should be banned. People use it at work and it’s like, “Really? Is it necessary that I hear both halves of your conversation?”. I hate it so much.
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Biggest pet peeve is passive aggressive Facebooking. If you have something to say, have the balls to say it in person.
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When you’re at lunch with someone you haven’t seen in ages and they are constantly on their phone instead of engaging with you.
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I hate hate hate when someone I’m talking to in person stops paying attention to me to read a text. Extra hate points for when the text distracts him/her so much that s/he forgets what I was saying. “Sorry..what were you saying?”
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Those people who cannot end their cell phone call for the 30 seconds that they’re in the elevator. And then the whole call is “What? What? I can’t hear you. I’M IN AN ELEVATOR! WHAT? It’s almost my floor. Floor! Hello? Can you hear me now?”
Not that this happens to me every morning. *sigh*
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It has to be when you are with someone trying to spend time together and they are having quality time with their phone.
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Talking on your cell phone when there is a live person in front of you that you are interacting with – that’s cashiers, baristas, anyone. Talk to the person. Call your phone-person back.
OK – that, and talking on your cell phone in your car in nasty blizzard conditions.
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Reply to emails, just to let people know you’ve gotten the message.
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When my husband reads DIGG on his cellphone while we are laying in bed.
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When I’m studying in the library or coffee shop with wifi and people are talking loudly. They used to be quiet zones. No longer.
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My biggest peeves are ones that I am a culprit of myself- calling fifteen times in a row when you *really* need to get a hold of someone, leaving a long, meandering voicemail that simply amounts to “call me back”, and, well, leaving voicemails at all. I’d much rather read a text than have to sit through a voicemail of any length.
My favorite mobile use, though, is when my mom texts me from the grocery store with pictures of the cookie aisle. Best use of a text, ever.
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When people feel like they ALWAYS have to answer their cell phones, and then complain about having to talk to whomever called. Um, don’t answer the phone if you don’t want to talk. Of course, I screen all calls, which is probably someone else’s pet peeve…
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Seeing the cellphone light up during a movie, a play, a concert… argh!
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If it takes you 7 tweets to say something, you are missing the point.
Go blog it or something.
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I really hate when people talk on their phones while purchasing something, never (or barely) acknowledging the clerk.
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Texting while conversing. rather than indicating that you need to send a text, you start texting and say “uh huh” in a monotone voice to respond to what I’m saying and you’re not paying attention to. For the record, I also hate it when I’m talking to someone on the phone and they start having conversations with people in the room where they are while I’m still talking! I can stop talking for over a minute before the person realizes it!
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I can’t stand it when people’s phones go off on vibrate during a show (a play, a movie, etc) and act like they can’t hear it. So you can’t pay attention to the play because you hear someone BUZZZ BUZZZZ BUZZZZZZZing for several minutes.
And then to top it all off, there’s the final voicemail BUZZZZZZ. No good. No good at all.
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I don’t think there is any reason to use a cell phone at the dinner (breakfast, lunch…) table. If you MUST talk or text, please excuse yourself and keep it quick.
I should add that neither my husband or actually have a cell phone, so maybe I’m out of touch regarding what is generally acceptable mealtime mobile behaviour, but really, I’m not so sure I’d feel differently even if we did use mobile devices.
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Peps who use their phones as mini boom boxes on public transportation.
It’s doesn’t help that they tend also to have horrendous taste in music.
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I hate texting shorthand and the devolving state of grammar. In particular, I can’t handle “U” instead of “you.” Does it really take that much longer to type the y and o? No, no it does not.
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As a teacher I would have parents call or text their teenagers in class all the time! Come on, parent, you know your child is in school and not allowed to use their phone!
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My pet peeve is when people think 24/7 access means it’s a good idea to respond immediately without thinking things through. At the very least, people seem to have more trouble typing professional responses when foiled by iphone auto-spell; it is also stranger when a colleague is responding at 2 am after they seem have been out drinking.
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Can I leave two? First, I like punctuation. In fact, I think it’s necessary to understand meaning most of the time. It seems commas and periods are too hard to find these days while texting and even emailing. Second, interacting too often with one’s phone while in a social situation. It gives the impression that the real world is less important than the virtual world, and, quite frankly, it’s not.
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I try not to get too riled up by mobile ettiquette, but the thing that’s been bugging me lately is when someone answers their cellphone, only to tell me they’re in a meeting and can’t talk. Well duh – don’t answer your phone then!
Also, I have to say that I die a little each time the English language is butchered in the name of TXT abbreviations.
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You get 160 characters. (140 if tweeting.) I can understand if your original message is 165 characters so you go back and take out a few letters (when what you mean is still obvious) so you don’t have to start a whole new text. And when I get a whole paragraph from you, I am aware that is what you did. What chaps at me as when people take a three word sentence and try to shorten it! Frequently from my mother, who used to want to be a teacher, before she started her current career, my stepfather, who IS a teacher, and my stepsister, who is in college to become a teacher, I get texts like “Where r u?” and “What r u doing?” My mother I can forgive because texting frustrates her a lot and she has one of those phones with the 1-9 keys but no qwerty keyboard. People with full keyboards who have enough time on their hands? Should respect the English language more than that!
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I hate when I’m eating with a friend and they answer a call and carry on a conversation! Am I not entertaining enough?!
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I hate that everyone can get ahold of me all the time. If I have 20 minutes to catch up, I’ll be at home not doing anything and I’ll call you. Thank goodness for voicemail.
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