While we were at SxSW, Laura and I threw a Mobile Manners brunch with Intel. We gathered a group of very smart women to eat quiche and text one other about the irritating things people do with their gadgets.
Genevieve Bell, an Intel Fellow who studies how different cultures use technology, presented some of their mobile etiquette research.
During Genevieve’s presentation, I tweeted while she was talking (event hashtag, FTW), checked in to Foursquare, and texted with a person sitting two tables away from me. Afterward, I drove around town looking for a funeral parlor, because I’ve heard those are nice quiet places to make phone calls.
Everyone else was the picture of civility, even when the gift bags came out.
Now that’s some good home training.
The bags were a team effort amongst attendees, and as always we saved one for you. Maile brought her gorgeous Epiphanie Bags, and I set aside the Clover Laptop and Camera Bag in grey, which is the one I carry. Everywhere. And sometimes I spoon with it. It looks like this:
Elizabeth works for Twitter, but also has a letterpress business called Paperwheel Press. She brought everyone a couple of geeky letterpress thank you notes:
And finally, Intel threw in a copy of Emily Post’s Great Get Togethers:
To win, please leave your pinky out when you sip your tea, and leave your most profound mobile etiquette peeve in comments.
Please only enter once; I’ll leave comments open until Monday when I’ll announce the winner. I hope it’s you.
Mighty Girl 
When I’m out with a friend and she is texting her live-in partner. Dude! you are going to see him and 4-5 minutes. Major annoys-balls
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It’s never OK to use your cell phone in the bathroom- not in the stall, not on the bench beside the sinks, not while leaning against the sink. Allow it to go to voicemail- your fellow ladies’ room patrons will thank you and so will the caller!
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When people use the phone like it’s a tin can. One does not need to shout to be heard.
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My peeve stems from other people shopping and jaw-jacking at an eleven on their cell phones while I’m trying to get a few things with small children in tow. Invariably I end up having to explain things like “affair” and “B.J.” because of the things the shop-caster was going on about.
And no, I didn’t NOT follow her around for all the juicy details! (She was loud enough to hear many aisles over.)
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I despise hearing the overage from someone else’s earbuds during a live performance.
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I hate the feeling of being less important when you’re engaged in conversation with someone and they take a call (as Kate @ Savour Fare says).
And then they walk away from you (for the phone call’s privacy), speak on the phone for longer than they spoke to you and appear to be a whole lot more engaged with that person.
Huh..maybe I have self-esteem issues :->.
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Answering and checking the phone while I am asking a question. My boss does this to me CONSTANTLY and it drives me nuts. He also checks his mail when he is driving and it not only drives me nuts, but also makes me a little nervous…
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My pet peeve is when someone’s phone rings during a meeting, event, dinner, etc. not just once, but TWICE. The first time I can consider the loud ringing to be a careless accident, but there’s absolutely no excuse for not putting it on vibrate before the SECOND infraction.
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It drives me crazy when people use their phone as a speakerphone on the train. Listening to one end of a stranger’s boring conversation is enough.
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people texting in a dark theater. or texting while driving.
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when people use thier OUTSIDE VOICE while on the phone. keep your private conversation just that. PRIVATE.
additionally, when someone calls me on speaker phone. I mean, I get it when they need thier hands free, but otherwise? It’s just LAZY
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Why must people yell into the phone? Even Alexander Graham Bell didn’t have to speak so loudly.
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I hate it when people put their cell phones on silent, and then constantly check them to see if they’ve gotten any texts, calls, or emails. It drives me insane!
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Texting while I am out to dinner with you. Even if it is from your fifteen year old. Probably it can wait one hour until you get to your car.
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The texting round robin. We’ve confirmed plans. Don’t text me 15 times to reconfirm only to then text a half hour before to change plans. Seriously.
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I hate when you are in the car with someone and they are on the phone the whole time.
I love those bags!
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I echo what many others have said – having someone answer their phone or check their email when you’re in the middle of a conversation. Especially if it is just the two of us. Especially while we’re eating a meal.
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Now, I’m on my phone a LOT (not talking so much as checking facebook and texting and such), and I’ll admit to it. I tone it down if I’m not with a like-minded techie, but I HATE HATE HATE people who insist on checking their phone/texting in a darkened public place, such as a movie theater or symphony concert, etc.
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Someone already said this, but by far the coworker that stays on the phone with a client while using the restroom. If you’re in a nearby stall, you’re wondering if they can hear you pee. Then do you wait to flush so you can try to allow you coworker to save face?! I definitely have issues with this.
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I can’t believe people who use their phones in the public bathroom stalls. That is just gross and can’t the person on the other end hear the echoey splashy sounds and flushing? Icky.
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It drives me crazy when I’m having a live conversation with someone that checks their phone every time they get a text and then responds. I’m like… I’m here and not checking my phone, aren’t I more important than some random “friend” from Facebook?
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So, I sat next to someone in church who was reading the Bible on their ipad. I wouldn’t have had an issue with it except for the fact that they apparently hadn’t yet figured out how to adjust the brightness and I nearly considered putting on my sunglasses.
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My favorite is when someone leaves a business voicemail where they say their number a bunch of times but don’t actually say what it’s about. I can’t assign a priority to it if I don’t know why you’re calling and/or what you want.
It’s kind of like how Bridget Jones’s mum leaves a message with just “Bridget Jones’s Mother.” and that’s it. I need more info!
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I, too, hate talking on the actual phone. I just had my second baby and really hated it when my doula (who was awesome by the way) wanted to actually talk instead of just letting me text her updates during labor. No joke.
I manage a team of people who talk ALL DAY on the phone though so that’s my excuse.
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i hate when your call gets dropped (thanks AT&T) and then the person on the other end doenst hang up right away so you have to call a few times to resume your call.
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One I am guilty of is talking on the phone while I grocery shop. I have two small kids – it is one of the few opportunities I get to talk uninterrupted. One I will never understand – talking while using a public restroom.
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Um, less pet peeve and more something that puts me in a righteous rage. Checking phones while driving. In general, this is frightening (and usually illegal — hence the righteousness) but when you go and do something stupid like turn the wrong way down a one way street, fail to signal, ride between lanes, or almost hit a pedestrians – I go nuts. Also, if it is night and your phone glows we know what you are doing(!), even if the phone is in your lap. And I’m spent.
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Music “while I am waiting for my party to be reached” is for the birds.
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My most recent pet-peeve with a mobile device was when I took my kids to the doctor and my in-laws wanted to tag along. My mother-in-law, a real estate agent, answered her phone while the doctor was in the room talking to me, and she proceeded to speak loudly while I was attempting to ask the doctor questions. I sent her out of the room eventually, it didn’t seem to register with her that this was incredibly rude!!
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Here in Vancouver it’s those who have loud converstation on the phones while riding the bus. I’ve many personal things I don’t want to know about people I don’t know!
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Please don’t walk and text. You run into me one more time and I’m going to body check you, hockey style.
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Where to begin…
When I worked as a barista people constantly tried to order while talking on the cell phone. They’d often apologize to the person they were talking to for interrupting them so they could order instead of apologizing to me. Those people got decaf. Sometimes I’d give them whole milk if they ordered nonfat. 🙂
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I still dislike texting – I know it has it’s place, just not when I’m trying to have a conversation with you…
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The texting-while-talking-to-someone-else has been covered, but what really bugs me about it is when the texting person has their phone in their lap under the table, but tilts their head up while looking down to type, as if the position of their skull will make me think they are actually looking at me while I talk!
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I really hate it when I’m eating at a restaurant with someone and they take out their phones at the table. Some exceptions aside, this drives me nuts.
A few months ago my boyfriend and I were at an oyster bar and we saw a couple on an iPad at the bar. He turned to me and said, “let’s make a rule to never use our phones when we’re dining together.” It was oddly romantic.
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I can’t stand it when people are in a meeting, movie, or any other social gathering where other people are attempting to pay attention to the event at hand and not only does someone’s phone, which they didn’t bother to switch to vibrate goes off, and then they answer it before getting up to exit the room and talk the whole way out. I understand the need to have your phone on in case of an emergency but if you are leaving the room to take a call wait until you are on the other side of the door to pick up!
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When my mom first got a cell phone she would only use it to MAKE calls, not answer them, because she couldn’t figure out how to answer a phone that you didn’t have to pick up off of its holder mounted on the wall! This, of course, made it impossible to actually CALL her…she has since learned and now even has her voice mailbox set up…I love her dearly.
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My least favorite techy thing is unsilenced phones in situations when it’s most appropriate…movie theaters, meetings, formal military events. So you can’t disconnect completely and turn the phone off – fine. At least make it silent so if that oh-so-important call comes in, you can make a sneaky get-away to answer it!
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If I call someone and get their voice mail, I leave a message with content. I don’t drone on- I plan a short, coherent message while their greeting plays. But I lay out what is going on, or question I have, or I give them info they’ve asked for. It drives me crazy when people just refer to their call log to see who phoned, ignore the message, and call back, asking, “What did you want?” The message is right there waiting to answer that question for you! But I guess your time is so valuable that you can’t risk listening to a voice message that might not be worthy of it?
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Please don’t continue to talk on the phone when it’s your turn at the cashier. I was a barista in the late 90s when public cell talkers were just starting to show up. It was back when it was considered rude on OUR part to think the customer was rude. I love seeing signs at businesses that ask customers to finish their call before coming to the cash register. It’s like I’m finally being validated. (And I can’t believe people are STILL doing it.)
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I’m from St. Louis, which is the land of “trivia nights”. One major rule of trivia is that you can’t check the phone for answers during a round (since most of us have interwebs access on our phones now). So I’m sorry, but that text/call from your husband or babysitter or whomever will just have to wait five minutes until the round is over. Because I don’t want to be DQ’d.
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I hate when you’re spending time with someone and he/she keeps checking their smartphone in the midst of conversation
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Someone opening their phone while in a movie. The bright light from the display totally jars me out of the experience.
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Texting, checking the time, even pulling out/opening your phone at a movie theater. That light is like a tiny beacon that’s a hundred feet away, and my eyes are drawn to it, pulling me away from the movie. When I’m paying $10+ for a movie ticket instead of staying home with Netflix, I want as few distractions as possible!
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My husbands best friend will pull out his iphone and ipad and wander around the store with us while surfing the web on both devices… our response is always REALLY?! like in the commercial, big peeve of ours.
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My pet peeve is somebody talking very loudly on their cell phone anywhere, in the car, in public, etc. Please take it down a notch.
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Send a text message instead of leaving a voicemail. It makes the most sense, really.
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Oh my goodness it drives me insane when someone is on the phone in a public restroom – I do not enjoy providing pee muzak for strangers via cell!
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I work in retail so OF COURSE mine is being on the phone when checking out at a cash register. I get so mad!
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When a co-worker stops and takes a personal cell call when we are right in the middle of a “work-related” conversation – drives me crazy evertime. I have even seen one who would interupt the president of the company and tell him to hold on while she answered hr cellphone – and most of the time it’s her children calling to tell mom that they made it home from school.
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