Wallow, the Soundtrack

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So sick. I woke up with a fever and chills and the smell of death on the air. I wish this bed would stop touching me so I could sleep.

Anyway, when I was young and feeling heartbroken, I used to make breakup tapes with one side for feeling sorry for myself and one with happy music. Did you ever do this? While I’m incapacitated, please add links to songs to weep by and songs that make you dance around in your underwear.

When my skin isn’t peeling up at the edges, I shall make a mixtape.

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321 thoughts on “Wallow, the Soundtrack”

  1. Though it’s hardly a “panty dancing” song, I’ve always found strength in Diana Ross’s “It’s My Turn”. Oddly, it’s never really applied. Maybe there’s a reason it’s the song that immediately comes to mind now.

    Love you.

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  2. Chelsea Hotel by Leonard Cohen is a big wallowing song for me. Loss and nostalgia, even for the bad times.

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  3. Sad (because the former love of my life said it described how much he loved me, which was romantic until he suddenly didn’t love me anymore and started loving some chick in Minnesota intsead): Tom Waits’ “Picture in a Frame”

    Also sad (because I dated him in two rounds — once in college and once in our thirties…I first heard this song during the in between time and it haunted me): Sara Bareilles’ “Gravity”

    Underwear Dancing (because it’s so damn peppy I can’t help myself): Enrique Iglesias’ “I Like It”

    And a long time (secret) underwear dancing song: Ricky Martin’s “The Cup of Life”

    xoxo.

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  4. Sad:

    “Wise Up” Aimee Mann
    “At This Point in My Life” – Tracy Chapman
    “Going Out” – Sarah Harmer
    “A Case of You” – KD Lang or Joni Mitchell

    Upbeat:

    “Home for a Rest” – Spirit of the West
    “Freedom” – George Michael
    “Body Movin'” – Beastie Boys feat. Fatboy Slim
    “Everyday People” – Sly and the Family Stone

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  5. Dear Maggie,

    I hope your family is doing okay and I’m thinking of you guys. Here are my ideas for what is sure to amount to an epic mix tape.

    Sad Sad Songs:

    Romeo and Juliet – The Killers

    Your Mother and I- Loudon Wainwright III

    Gone Away- Lucy Schwartz

    So Far Away- Carole King

    Falling Slowly – Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova

    Clouds- Joni Mitchell

    Hallelujah- Rufus Wainwright (I always thought his version was the saddest)

    Happy Amazing Made of Awesome Music:

    Valerie – Amy Winehouse (fast version)

    It Takes Two- DJ EZ Rock & Rob Base

    Gloria- Laura Branigan

    Relator- Pete Yorn & Scarlett Johansson

    Alison- Jeremy Fisher (sorry, the studio version is MIA)

    F**k You- Cee Lo Green

    One Week- Barenaked Ladies

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  6. Hi Maggie,

    This doesn’t fall into the category of mix tape, but it’s very applicable!: the episode of This American Life called Break-Up (#339). The first act especially, where Phil Collins helps Starlee Kine write a break-up song, is amazing. I listened to it a bunch last year when my 6-year relationship was going through its tragic end, because I could just so thoroughly relate. One of my favorite lines: “Before the break-up, I had no idea how much break-up music was out there. For example, every song ever written. Or at least every third.”

    Sad song: I second the folks who mentioned Bonnie Raitt’s “I can’t make you love me.” It STILL kills me!

    Happy dancing song!: “Canned Heat” by Jamiroquai. Yooouuu know this boogie is for reeeaaal!

    Very, very big hugs to you, Maggie.

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  8. Sad:
    Sentimental Heart, She and Him
    Samson, Regina Spektor
    When Your Mind’s Made Up from Once
    I’ll Be Seeing You, Billie Holiday
    Dracula’s Lament by Jason Segel (too ridiculous to actually be sad, but it helps bridge the way to happy)

    Happy:
    Kick Drum Heart by the Avett Brothers (Someone already mentioned this one, but I had to second it.)
    Baby..the Glee cover of Justin Bieber. Maybe more of a transitional song than strictly happy.
    Angel of Harlem, U2
    Firework, Katy Perry

    I’m so sorry things are rough now, but you are all kinds of awesome.

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  9. The weep & sob story song: “Blue Bonnets” – K.C. Clifford (You can stream it on her website http://www.kcclifford.com/music, and then buy the song/album on iTunes or CDBaby)

    The angry & sad break-up song: “Still Hurting” from the musical The Last Five Years (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6G-pCykYl4)

    The feel free and happy driving on a cool spring evening song: “Race You” – Elizabeth and the Catapult (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-Ved2Jq4Yk)

    The can’t sit still when you listen to it song: “I Don’t Feel Like Dancing” – Scissor Sisters (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4H5I6y1Qvz0)

    Feel better soon, in all sorts of ways.

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  10. To Wallow:
    The Promise, Tracy Chapman
    Fix You, Coldplay
    Scratch, Kendall Payne
    You Were Mine, Dixie Chicks
    Stay or Leave, Dave Matthews Band

    To Dance:
    No Man’s Woman, Sinead O’Connor
    Livin’ On a Prayer, Bon Jovi
    It’s Raining Men, Geri Halliwell
    Perfect Time of Day, Howie Day
    Rock DJ, Robbie Williams

    And don’t forget the Joe Cocker classic, Get By With a Little Help From My Friends. Be well, friend.

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  11. I recently went through a break up after a 3.5 year relationship. Here are some songs that helped me

    (on the happy side):
    Dog Days Are Over — Florence + The Machine
    Firework — Katy Perry

    (on the happy or sad side — really worthwhile):
    Hard Times Come Again No More — Edgar Meyer, James Taylor, Mark O’Connor & Yo-Yo Ma

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  12. Happy songs from my breakup mix cd:

    Breakin’ Up by Rilo Kiley (the mostvupbeat break up song I’ve found)
    Chin Up, Cheer Up by Ryan Adams
    And I second (and 3rd and 4th, etc.) CeeLo Green F You

    Sad
    The Weepies, World Spins Madly On

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  13. I can’t not dance whenever I hear Hesta Prynn:

    Also, it’s not really super dancy, but something about Atomic Tom’s ‘Take Me Out’ unleashes the 80s child in me, and I wanna boogie.

    The songs that make me weepy aren’t necessarily sad songs, so I defer to everyone else’s judgment on that one.

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  14. To dance I like the theme song to the Jefferson’s. When things were hardest here, I would sing it to my daughter.

    That, and Bob Marley’s “Three Little Birds.”

    Every little thing’s gonna be all right.

    (feel better!)

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  15. ‘Raise Your Glass’ by Pink. She is super cool, the beat is fantastic, and the lyrics perfect. It is a song designed for jumping & dancing & tossing your hair!

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  16. Hello my love! Feel better as soon as possible!

    Two songs to dance to:
    I Like It by Enrique Iglesias (I’ve been shaking it to this song all week!)

    Pon de Floor by Major Lazer

    To cry:
    Paperweight by Schuyler Fisk and Joshua Radin (Dear John soundtrack…so many tears.)

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  18. The Light in the Piazza, from the Broadway musical of the same name.

    I don’t know why, but this song makes me hopeful.

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  19. Sad: The Red House Painters, “All Mixed Up.” This is a remake of the Cars’ song but it’s barely recognizable. Really beautiful, really blue.

    Happy: The Who’s “Slip Kid” (Happy for the beat and the music, the lyrics are irrelevant)

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  20. Lesson Learned-Alicia Keyes
    You Oughta Know – Alanis Morrisette
    flip side
    Wait Til they see my Smile – Alicia Keyes

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  21. Ugh. My lists are called “For When You Sleep” and “For When You Dance”. Even when I’m not sad, Ryan Adams How Do You Keep Love Alive makes me weep. Also Coldplay The Scientist. And John Mayer (if you can get over the fact that it’s John Mayer) Slow Dancing in a Burning Room. But then switch it over to happy: Ryan Adams Gonna Make You Love Me, The Cure Just Like Heaven, Barenaked Ladies Be My Yoko Ono and anything by Cake.

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  22. Happy:
    Ca plane pour moi – Plastic Bertrand
    The Crystal Cat – Dan Deacon
    Chores – Animal Collective
    Daft Punk Is Playing At My House – LCD Soundsystem
    Tell ‘Em – Sleigh Bells
    Around Us – Jonsi
    G Turns to D – Sloan
    Hold Tight – Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick & Tich
    Grow Up – Chromeo
    Chicken Payback – A Band of Bees
    Early Warnings – Love Is All
    Bangers & Mash – Radiohead
    Northshore – Tegan and Sara
    Swim – surfer Blood

    Sad:
    Say It To Me Now – Glen Hansard
    Who’s Gonna Save My Soul – Gnarls Barkley
    Reflections – Diana Ross
    Islands in the Stream – Constantines and Feist

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  24. Sad: Somewhere Over the Rainbow — Israel Kamakawiwo’ole

    Happy: Pinch Me — Barenaked Ladies

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  26. As with all Bob Dylan, it’s really a toss up on wallow/happy. I’m going with wallow on this one.
    Bob Dylan- Don’t Think Twice It’s Alright

    & this one.

    Bon Iver- Skinny love

    But for happy, dance-in-your-underwear, heal and come back there’s:

    Maxine Nightingale’s Right Back Where We Started From: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ckCwBAhz4oc

    &

    Murder By Death’s As Long As There Is Whiskey In the World (which is bittersweet, but fun): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lonz_cHJHNk

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  28. i guess this qualifies as sad,

    time has told me – nick drake.

    (although all nick drake is good for the soul)

    many hugs to you.

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  29. Here are my go-to break-up/start to recover songs.

    “Starting Now” – Ingrid Michaelson

    “All The Way Down” – The Swell Season

    “Why Don’t You Love Me” – Beyonce

    “Song For The Dumped” – Ben Folds Five

    “Someday You Will Be Loved” – Death Cab For Cutie

    “World Spins Madly On” – The Weepies

    “The Cave” – Mumford & Sons

    “Clap Your Hands” – Sia

    “Kiss You Off” – Scissor Sisters

    “This Too Shall Pass” – OK Go

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  31. I hope you feel better soon Maggie, take care.

    Here are my top choices for songs to weep by:

    Pearl Jam – Parting Ways

    Jeff Buckley – Last Goodbye

    Ben Harper – Heart of Matters

    Band of Horses – No One’s Gonna Love You

    Now some happy dancing:

    Pink – God is a DJ

    Glee Cast – Dog Days Are Over (all the voices together at the end, hugely uplifting! It will give you goosebumps)

    Ben Harper – Fly One Time (a great anthem)

    Like

  32. I know way too many sad songs, but a good one that is haunting and beautiful is The Walkmen’s “On the Water”…

    My two favorite pick-me-up, rally-to-feel-better-about-life songs are Bob Marley’s “Three Little Birds” and Jimmy Eat World’s “The Middle”…

    Hope you get to feeling like your old self soon – physically, and emotionally. 🙂 All the best to you.

    Like

  34. Yesterday, I had stupid brain freeze but I thought about you last night and I have more suggestions.
    The breakup album : Forever Blue by Chris Isaak

    Happy music : anything you love & know by heart and can sing along to very loudly, even sober, my faves are Pixies songs or old Motown hits.
    Take very good care of yourself and remember what Frank sang, the best is yet to come… 🙂

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  35. weep: Let It Go – by Paco

    dance: Take On Me – A-ha

    Music has magical powers, this is such an excellent way to heal and work through all aspects of life. I don’t even know you personally, but I’ve been thinking of you a lot. Wishing you the best and rooting for you 🙂

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  37. Everytime We Touch, by Cascada, is one song that totally gets my head ROCKIN. It makes me want to stand on top of the table in a restaurant and get the whole crowd dancing.

    On the sad side, I used to listen to Unbreak My Heart by Toni Braxton all the time when my first love broke up with me. (Poor neighbors having to hear it constantly!) (Ok now I’m embarrassed admitting I was so into that song in the late 90’s!)

    Maggie, I’m sorry you’re going through this. Take care of yourself, and remember, time will heal. 🙂 Sending many good vibes your way!

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  38. Most of my breaking up days were in the mid-90s when the music was grungy and sad by nature. After that, I decided to be the heart breaker and therefore don’t have much knowledge of the modern melancholy musical musings. I hear Cold Play is good. I always love a good old ballad I can belt out in the shower and bawl with.

    And I think someone else posted that Pink is good for the dancing in the underwear. Definitely Pink. She wrote a lot about breaking up with her hubby and going out and still partying. That should definitely be your anthem when you are ready to rock again.

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  40. Angry-sad

    -Get Gone (Fiona Apple) nice and florid

    -Silent All These Years (Tori Amos)

    – Don’t Get Your Back Up (Sarah Harmer)

    Sad-sad:

    -For You (Barenaked Ladies)

    – I Can’t Make You Love Me (Bonnie Raitt)

    -Big Blue Sea (Bob Schneider)

    -Buckets of Rain (Redbird cover – is a Bob Dylan song)

    -Metal and Steel (Bob Schneider) . . . one of my all time favorite songs, period. About being strong in the face of horrible events.

    Sad-but-gonna-make-it:

    – Long Way to Get (Bob Schneider)

    – Go On (Jack Johnson)

    – All of My Days (Alexi Murdoch)

    – The Hideout (Sarah Harmer)

    – Sooner or Later (Michael Tolcher)

    – We Are (Sweet Honey in the Rock)

    – Amazing Grace (Ladysmith Black Mambazo & Paul Simon)

    – Constant Craving (KD Lang) . . . the single line about someone brave marching beneath my skin is really powerful

    -Breathe/2AM (Anna Nalick) – also makes us giggle because one of my daughters thought the lyric was “Scream . . . just scream . . . ” for a long time. Perhaps more useful advice, in fact.

    Get up and dance:
    – I Wish I was a Punk Rocker (Sandi Thom)

    – O-o-h Child (Nina Simone version please)

    – Absolutely (Nine Days)

    – Weapon of Choice (Fatboy Slim)

    – Feel Good Inc. (Gorillaz)

    – Flathead (The Fratellis)

    – Walkie Talkie Man (Steriogram)

    (Yes, I have a thing for ipod commercials, LOL! Good songs though.)

    Another vote for the new Pink song too, Raise Your Glass.

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  42. I can’t believe I didn’t mention this the first time. Michael Jackson’s Off the Wall album, all of it, but in particular, “Off the Wall.”

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  43. a little New Order is always good for the soul and covers both ranges. weird/sad lyrics over that dancey-dance beat is rad. plus, teenage nostalgia!!

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  44. For fun
    Kylie Minogue: Aphrodite http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjwC_AxUHyg

    Jennifer Lopez: Feelin’ So Good http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MA6_aLqataI

    Nina Simone: Feelin’ Good (joe clausell remix)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZXMJi-ziPUI

    Kelis: Brave (acoustic) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRgkfp_okMc

    Telepopmusik: Breathe http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDQw-RShRUQ

    For wallowing:
    Norah Jones: You’ve Ruined Me (my GOD – this song)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGzKZQEOm_Q

    Adele: Set Fire To The Rain http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VK4TwstB2AM

    Johnny Cash: Hurt http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o22eIJDtKho

    R.E.M.: Half A World Away http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLMnpB51vVM

    Robyn: Dancing On My Own/Indestructible (acoustic)/With Every Heartbeat

    Erlend Oye: If I Ever Feel Better http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esAj90KnCmQ

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  46. There’s no sadder breakup song than Gladys Knight’s “Neither One of Us” also what about Natalie Cole’s “Someone That I Used to Love”. Then chase those bad boys with “Rain” by Bishop Allen and pat yourself on the back for getting through another day. You will get through this. Promise.

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  47. I totally did that! In fact, even though it’s been ages since I’ve broken up, I still have the playlist on my computer. Do you want us to send you CDs? Mine including things like Cake’s “I will Survive” and “Single Girl” by this faboo band called the Clumsy Lovers (about a chick who is married and wishes she were a single girl again, and it reminds me about all the fabulous things that come with being single)

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  48. I posted these with links, but I guess the comment didnt get through moderation. I assure you they can all be found on youtube and itunes, etc.

    For Weeping:
    Pretty Girl at the Airport by The Avett Brothers
    In the Deep by Bird York
    (There were one or two others but I cant remember them now!)

    For Dancing:
    Keep Your Head Up by Andrew Grammer
    The Rubberband Man by The Spinners
    Battleflag by Lo Fidelity Allstars (explicit)

    Chin up, Maggie! We’re pulling for you!

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  49. Poison and Wine by The Civil Wars. A bit weepy, but so confidence-building. And so “real relationship”. Plus, the video is lovely.

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  50. for wallowing, but with a glimmer of hope that things will look up:

    [Radiohead: Lucky]

    for rejoicing that things have looked up:

    [Florence & the Machine: Dog Days Are Over]

    wishes for things looking up physically (and emotionally, too).

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