So sick. I woke up with a fever and chills and the smell of death on the air. I wish this bed would stop touching me so I could sleep.
Anyway, when I was young and feeling heartbroken, I used to make breakup tapes with one side for feeling sorry for myself and one with happy music. Did you ever do this? While I’m incapacitated, please add links to songs to weep by and songs that make you dance around in your underwear.
When my skin isn’t peeling up at the edges, I shall make a mixtape.
Though it’s hardly a “panty dancing” song, I’ve always found strength in Diana Ross’s “It’s My Turn”. Oddly, it’s never really applied. Maybe there’s a reason it’s the song that immediately comes to mind now.
Love you.
LikeLike
Chelsea Hotel by Leonard Cohen is a big wallowing song for me. Loss and nostalgia, even for the bad times.
LikeLike
Sad (because the former love of my life said it described how much he loved me, which was romantic until he suddenly didn’t love me anymore and started loving some chick in Minnesota intsead): Tom Waits’ “Picture in a Frame”
Also sad (because I dated him in two rounds — once in college and once in our thirties…I first heard this song during the in between time and it haunted me): Sara Bareilles’ “Gravity”
Underwear Dancing (because it’s so damn peppy I can’t help myself): Enrique Iglesias’ “I Like It”
And a long time (secret) underwear dancing song: Ricky Martin’s “The Cup of Life”
xoxo.
LikeLike
Sad:
“Wise Up” Aimee Mann
“At This Point in My Life” – Tracy Chapman
“Going Out” – Sarah Harmer
“A Case of You” – KD Lang or Joni Mitchell
Upbeat:
“Home for a Rest” – Spirit of the West
“Freedom” – George Michael
“Body Movin'” – Beastie Boys feat. Fatboy Slim
“Everyday People” – Sly and the Family Stone
LikeLike
Dear Maggie,
I hope your family is doing okay and I’m thinking of you guys. Here are my ideas for what is sure to amount to an epic mix tape.
Sad Sad Songs:
Romeo and Juliet – The Killers
Your Mother and I- Loudon Wainwright III
Gone Away- Lucy Schwartz
So Far Away- Carole King
Falling Slowly – Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova
Clouds- Joni Mitchell
Hallelujah- Rufus Wainwright (I always thought his version was the saddest)
Happy Amazing Made of Awesome Music:
Valerie – Amy Winehouse (fast version)
It Takes Two- DJ EZ Rock & Rob Base
Gloria- Laura Branigan
Relator- Pete Yorn & Scarlett Johansson
Alison- Jeremy Fisher (sorry, the studio version is MIA)
F**k You- Cee Lo Green
One Week- Barenaked Ladies
LikeLike
Hi Maggie,
This doesn’t fall into the category of mix tape, but it’s very applicable!: the episode of This American Life called Break-Up (#339). The first act especially, where Phil Collins helps Starlee Kine write a break-up song, is amazing. I listened to it a bunch last year when my 6-year relationship was going through its tragic end, because I could just so thoroughly relate. One of my favorite lines: “Before the break-up, I had no idea how much break-up music was out there. For example, every song ever written. Or at least every third.”
Sad song: I second the folks who mentioned Bonnie Raitt’s “I can’t make you love me.” It STILL kills me!
Happy dancing song!: “Canned Heat” by Jamiroquai. Yooouuu know this boogie is for reeeaaal!
Very, very big hugs to you, Maggie.
LikeLike
Oops, I also meant to link to the This American Life episode! Here it is:
http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/339/break-up
LikeLike
Sad:
Sentimental Heart, She and Him
Samson, Regina Spektor
When Your Mind’s Made Up from Once
I’ll Be Seeing You, Billie Holiday
Dracula’s Lament by Jason Segel (too ridiculous to actually be sad, but it helps bridge the way to happy)
Happy:
Kick Drum Heart by the Avett Brothers (Someone already mentioned this one, but I had to second it.)
Baby..the Glee cover of Justin Bieber. Maybe more of a transitional song than strictly happy.
Angel of Harlem, U2
Firework, Katy Perry
I’m so sorry things are rough now, but you are all kinds of awesome.
LikeLike
The weep & sob story song: “Blue Bonnets” – K.C. Clifford (You can stream it on her website http://www.kcclifford.com/music, and then buy the song/album on iTunes or CDBaby)
The angry & sad break-up song: “Still Hurting” from the musical The Last Five Years (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6G-pCykYl4)
The feel free and happy driving on a cool spring evening song: “Race You” – Elizabeth and the Catapult (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-Ved2Jq4Yk)
The can’t sit still when you listen to it song: “I Don’t Feel Like Dancing” – Scissor Sisters (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4H5I6y1Qvz0)
Feel better soon, in all sorts of ways.
LikeLike
To Wallow:
The Promise, Tracy Chapman
Fix You, Coldplay
Scratch, Kendall Payne
You Were Mine, Dixie Chicks
Stay or Leave, Dave Matthews Band
To Dance:
No Man’s Woman, Sinead O’Connor
Livin’ On a Prayer, Bon Jovi
It’s Raining Men, Geri Halliwell
Perfect Time of Day, Howie Day
Rock DJ, Robbie Williams
And don’t forget the Joe Cocker classic, Get By With a Little Help From My Friends. Be well, friend.
LikeLike
I recently went through a break up after a 3.5 year relationship. Here are some songs that helped me
(on the happy side):
Dog Days Are Over — Florence + The Machine
Firework — Katy Perry
(on the happy or sad side — really worthwhile):
Hard Times Come Again No More — Edgar Meyer, James Taylor, Mark O’Connor & Yo-Yo Ma
LikeLike
Happy songs from my breakup mix cd:
Breakin’ Up by Rilo Kiley (the mostvupbeat break up song I’ve found)
Chin Up, Cheer Up by Ryan Adams
And I second (and 3rd and 4th, etc.) CeeLo Green F You
Sad
The Weepies, World Spins Madly On
LikeLike
I can’t not dance whenever I hear Hesta Prynn:
Also, it’s not really super dancy, but something about Atomic Tom’s ‘Take Me Out’ unleashes the 80s child in me, and I wanna boogie.
The songs that make me weepy aren’t necessarily sad songs, so I defer to everyone else’s judgment on that one.
LikeLike
To dance I like the theme song to the Jefferson’s. When things were hardest here, I would sing it to my daughter.
That, and Bob Marley’s “Three Little Birds.”
Every little thing’s gonna be all right.
(feel better!)
LikeLike
‘Raise Your Glass’ by Pink. She is super cool, the beat is fantastic, and the lyrics perfect. It is a song designed for jumping & dancing & tossing your hair!
LikeLike
Hello my love! Feel better as soon as possible!
Two songs to dance to:
I Like It by Enrique Iglesias (I’ve been shaking it to this song all week!)
Pon de Floor by Major Lazer
To cry:
Paperweight by Schuyler Fisk and Joshua Radin (Dear John soundtrack…so many tears.)
LikeLike
For wallowing: Cheers Darlin’ by Damien Rice – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPPkFrPk6Zs
For undies-dancing: Manifesto by Cat Empire – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wGec6wN6p0A
LikeLike
The Light in the Piazza, from the Broadway musical of the same name.
I don’t know why, but this song makes me hopeful.
LikeLike
Sad: The Red House Painters, “All Mixed Up.” This is a remake of the Cars’ song but it’s barely recognizable. Really beautiful, really blue.
Happy: The Who’s “Slip Kid” (Happy for the beat and the music, the lyrics are irrelevant)
LikeLike
Lesson Learned-Alicia Keyes
You Oughta Know – Alanis Morrisette
flip side
Wait Til they see my Smile – Alicia Keyes
LikeLike
Ugh. My lists are called “For When You Sleep” and “For When You Dance”. Even when I’m not sad, Ryan Adams How Do You Keep Love Alive makes me weep. Also Coldplay The Scientist. And John Mayer (if you can get over the fact that it’s John Mayer) Slow Dancing in a Burning Room. But then switch it over to happy: Ryan Adams Gonna Make You Love Me, The Cure Just Like Heaven, Barenaked Ladies Be My Yoko Ono and anything by Cake.
LikeLike
Happy:
Ca plane pour moi – Plastic Bertrand
The Crystal Cat – Dan Deacon
Chores – Animal Collective
Daft Punk Is Playing At My House – LCD Soundsystem
Tell ‘Em – Sleigh Bells
Around Us – Jonsi
G Turns to D – Sloan
Hold Tight – Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick & Tich
Grow Up – Chromeo
Chicken Payback – A Band of Bees
Early Warnings – Love Is All
Bangers & Mash – Radiohead
Northshore – Tegan and Sara
Swim – surfer Blood
Sad:
Say It To Me Now – Glen Hansard
Who’s Gonna Save My Soul – Gnarls Barkley
Reflections – Diana Ross
Islands in the Stream – Constantines and Feist
LikeLike
Sad song-Band of Horses’s Evening Kitchen
Happy song-Florence and the Machine’s Dog Days are Over
LikeLike
Sad: Somewhere Over the Rainbow — Israel Kamakawiwo’ole
Happy: Pinch Me — Barenaked Ladies
LikeLike
Here’s one for your happy side: Sara Bareilles “Uncharted”
LikeLike
As with all Bob Dylan, it’s really a toss up on wallow/happy. I’m going with wallow on this one.
Bob Dylan- Don’t Think Twice It’s Alright
& this one.
Bon Iver- Skinny love
But for happy, dance-in-your-underwear, heal and come back there’s:
Maxine Nightingale’s Right Back Where We Started From: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ckCwBAhz4oc
&
Murder By Death’s As Long As There Is Whiskey In the World (which is bittersweet, but fun): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lonz_cHJHNk
LikeLike
Is it possible NOT to sing along to “I Will Survive”? To me, that’s the ultimate break-up empowerment song. Sad, fist-pumping, and danceable.
LikeLike
i guess this qualifies as sad,
time has told me – nick drake.
(although all nick drake is good for the soul)
many hugs to you.
LikeLike
Here are my go-to break-up/start to recover songs.
“Starting Now” – Ingrid Michaelson
“All The Way Down” – The Swell Season
“Why Don’t You Love Me” – Beyonce
“Song For The Dumped” – Ben Folds Five
“Someday You Will Be Loved” – Death Cab For Cutie
“World Spins Madly On” – The Weepies
“The Cave” – Mumford & Sons
“Clap Your Hands” – Sia
“Kiss You Off” – Scissor Sisters
“This Too Shall Pass” – OK Go
LikeLike
Ah! It’s been so fun to come back continually and read all the new suggestions!
“These Days” is Nico’s original: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J1N8GtDkYfQ&feature=fvwrel. The St. Vincent cover is also spectacular. This is probably my favorite song ever.
And I definitely, definitely second the Nick Drake suggestions. All of them. Yes.
LikeLike
I hope you feel better soon Maggie, take care.
Here are my top choices for songs to weep by:
Pearl Jam – Parting Ways
Jeff Buckley – Last Goodbye
Ben Harper – Heart of Matters
Band of Horses – No One’s Gonna Love You
Now some happy dancing:
Pink – God is a DJ
Glee Cast – Dog Days Are Over (all the voices together at the end, hugely uplifting! It will give you goosebumps)
Ben Harper – Fly One Time (a great anthem)
LikeLike
I know way too many sad songs, but a good one that is haunting and beautiful is The Walkmen’s “On the Water”…
My two favorite pick-me-up, rally-to-feel-better-about-life songs are Bob Marley’s “Three Little Birds” and Jimmy Eat World’s “The Middle”…
Hope you get to feeling like your old self soon – physically, and emotionally. 🙂 All the best to you.
LikeLike
Only happy today!
LikeLike
Yesterday, I had stupid brain freeze but I thought about you last night and I have more suggestions.
The breakup album : Forever Blue by Chris Isaak
Happy music : anything you love & know by heart and can sing along to very loudly, even sober, my faves are Pixies songs or old Motown hits.
Take very good care of yourself and remember what Frank sang, the best is yet to come… 🙂
LikeLike
weep: Let It Go – by Paco
dance: Take On Me – A-ha
Music has magical powers, this is such an excellent way to heal and work through all aspects of life. I don’t even know you personally, but I’ve been thinking of you a lot. Wishing you the best and rooting for you 🙂
LikeLike
My halfway between song is ‘Soulshine’ by Gov’t Mule.
LikeLike
Everytime We Touch, by Cascada, is one song that totally gets my head ROCKIN. It makes me want to stand on top of the table in a restaurant and get the whole crowd dancing.
On the sad side, I used to listen to Unbreak My Heart by Toni Braxton all the time when my first love broke up with me. (Poor neighbors having to hear it constantly!) (Ok now I’m embarrassed admitting I was so into that song in the late 90’s!)
Maggie, I’m sorry you’re going through this. Take care of yourself, and remember, time will heal. 🙂 Sending many good vibes your way!
LikeLike
Most of my breaking up days were in the mid-90s when the music was grungy and sad by nature. After that, I decided to be the heart breaker and therefore don’t have much knowledge of the modern melancholy musical musings. I hear Cold Play is good. I always love a good old ballad I can belt out in the shower and bawl with.
And I think someone else posted that Pink is good for the dancing in the underwear. Definitely Pink. She wrote a lot about breaking up with her hubby and going out and still partying. That should definitely be your anthem when you are ready to rock again.
LikeLike
If you want a really good wallow, listen to William Fitzsimmon’s album The Sparrow and the Crow.
Here’s a taster: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rbr80q4Rq1o
LikeLike
Angry-sad
-Get Gone (Fiona Apple) nice and florid
-Silent All These Years (Tori Amos)
– Don’t Get Your Back Up (Sarah Harmer)
Sad-sad:
-For You (Barenaked Ladies)
– I Can’t Make You Love Me (Bonnie Raitt)
-Big Blue Sea (Bob Schneider)
-Buckets of Rain (Redbird cover – is a Bob Dylan song)
-Metal and Steel (Bob Schneider) . . . one of my all time favorite songs, period. About being strong in the face of horrible events.
Sad-but-gonna-make-it:
– Long Way to Get (Bob Schneider)
– Go On (Jack Johnson)
– All of My Days (Alexi Murdoch)
– The Hideout (Sarah Harmer)
– Sooner or Later (Michael Tolcher)
– We Are (Sweet Honey in the Rock)
– Amazing Grace (Ladysmith Black Mambazo & Paul Simon)
– Constant Craving (KD Lang) . . . the single line about someone brave marching beneath my skin is really powerful
-Breathe/2AM (Anna Nalick) – also makes us giggle because one of my daughters thought the lyric was “Scream . . . just scream . . . ” for a long time. Perhaps more useful advice, in fact.
Get up and dance:
– I Wish I was a Punk Rocker (Sandi Thom)
– O-o-h Child (Nina Simone version please)
– Absolutely (Nine Days)
– Weapon of Choice (Fatboy Slim)
– Feel Good Inc. (Gorillaz)
– Flathead (The Fratellis)
– Walkie Talkie Man (Steriogram)
(Yes, I have a thing for ipod commercials, LOL! Good songs though.)
Another vote for the new Pink song too, Raise Your Glass.
LikeLike
I still make these cd’s – most recently a set called “Up” and “Down”, and another called “Sunny” and “Cloudy”
HAPPY: Things Will Get Better – Bend Sinister
http://radio3.cbc.ca/play/band/Bend-Sinister/Things-Will-Get-Better
SAD: This I Know – Juliette & The Licks
LikeLike
I can’t believe I didn’t mention this the first time. Michael Jackson’s Off the Wall album, all of it, but in particular, “Off the Wall.”
LikeLike
a little New Order is always good for the soul and covers both ranges. weird/sad lyrics over that dancey-dance beat is rad. plus, teenage nostalgia!!
LikeLike
For fun
Kylie Minogue: Aphrodite http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjwC_AxUHyg
Jennifer Lopez: Feelin’ So Good http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MA6_aLqataI
Nina Simone: Feelin’ Good (joe clausell remix)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZXMJi-ziPUI
Kelis: Brave (acoustic) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRgkfp_okMc
Telepopmusik: Breathe http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDQw-RShRUQ
For wallowing:
Norah Jones: You’ve Ruined Me (my GOD – this song)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGzKZQEOm_Q
Adele: Set Fire To The Rain http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VK4TwstB2AM
Johnny Cash: Hurt http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o22eIJDtKho
R.E.M.: Half A World Away http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLMnpB51vVM
Robyn: Dancing On My Own/Indestructible (acoustic)/With Every Heartbeat
Erlend Oye: If I Ever Feel Better http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esAj90KnCmQ
LikeLike
Multiply by Jamie Lidell. That song just makes me want to dance!!!
LikeLike
There’s no sadder breakup song than Gladys Knight’s “Neither One of Us” also what about Natalie Cole’s “Someone That I Used to Love”. Then chase those bad boys with “Rain” by Bishop Allen and pat yourself on the back for getting through another day. You will get through this. Promise.
LikeLike
I totally did that! In fact, even though it’s been ages since I’ve broken up, I still have the playlist on my computer. Do you want us to send you CDs? Mine including things like Cake’s “I will Survive” and “Single Girl” by this faboo band called the Clumsy Lovers (about a chick who is married and wishes she were a single girl again, and it reminds me about all the fabulous things that come with being single)
LikeLike
I posted these with links, but I guess the comment didnt get through moderation. I assure you they can all be found on youtube and itunes, etc.
For Weeping:
Pretty Girl at the Airport by The Avett Brothers
In the Deep by Bird York
(There were one or two others but I cant remember them now!)
For Dancing:
Keep Your Head Up by Andrew Grammer
The Rubberband Man by The Spinners
Battleflag by Lo Fidelity Allstars (explicit)
Chin up, Maggie! We’re pulling for you!
LikeLike
Poison and Wine by The Civil Wars. A bit weepy, but so confidence-building. And so “real relationship”. Plus, the video is lovely.
LikeLike
for wallowing, but with a glimmer of hope that things will look up:
[Radiohead: Lucky]
for rejoicing that things have looked up:
[Florence & the Machine: Dog Days Are Over]
wishes for things looking up physically (and emotionally, too).
LikeLike