27th February 2001


From: A friend at work.

Subject: Cultural observation.

Between you and me, there’s something about the British that gets under my skin. There’s an underlying “I’m more clever than you” in almost every dealing you have with them. The arrogance rivals that of the Germans, who are at least above board about it. –“Yes, ve are superior, why does zis surprise you?”

4:21 p.m.

When I got to work yesterday, my cube door was blocked off and the cube was brimming with balloons. Apparently, my coworkers have healthy lungs, and some time on their hands. Man, you’ve gotta try this. It’s just like one of those ball pits at McDonalds, except I don’t have to take my shoes off or shoulder check little kids to get some respect.

2:28 p.m.

Someone typed “find my dream girl” into Google and my page popped up. (I’m currently on the second page of links, at the top.) I haven’t decided if the search request was a technologically advanced form of stichomancy or just a slightly idealistic porn hunt. I would be flattered, but then I’d have to acknowledge the fact that I’m third on the list when you type in “girl on couch sofa.”

12:52 p.m.

OK, I’m back. I can’t eat anything that smells like food, but the trip was amazing overall. As soon as Bali Belly and jet lag subside (14-hour time change) I’ll post some travel blogs.

You. Can’t. Wait.

(OK, I can’t wait, but let me indulge in a little projection now and then. How is it hurting you?)

Meanwhile, I’d like to thank Dave for his generous help posting while I was gone. I brought him the meanest monkey mask ever. It’s shedding on his carpet at this very moment. So nice.

10:09 a.m.