Month: January 2009

Also Fanta Posse Sounds Vaguely Erotic

The Fanta Girls Are My Hip-Hop Posse
Say I’m too busy working on my streetwear line to find a posse. Enter the Fantanas, a pre-cast set of hot multi-ethnic chicks, ready to follow me around to parties. They’re never too exhausted to dance on the bar in my stead, and I’m pretty sure they never need to be fed or use the bathroom. That being the case, you may wonder why I wouldn’t call on the arguably more talented and media-savvy Pussycat Dolls. But I think someone is forgetting about the bottomless supply of second-rate mixers.

First Job: Whistleblower in Hotpants

My first real job was as a file clerk for the school district office, where my friend was stealing time. I’m the kind of person who feels a German level of discomfort about littering, so you can imagine me as a righteous, dismayed fifteen year old.

The clerks eventually told management about our suspicions. Did they not find it odd that she would sit in back with us for fifteen minutes, but mark six hours on her time sheet? They watched her for a week, pulled her aside to chat with her, and then never mentioned it again.

She continued to steal, in a slightly less dramatic fashion, and a few weeks later I was reprimanded for wearing cut-off shorts to the office.



Rainbows. Kittens. My hair.

I just closed comments on the circumcision post, because for the first time ever on Mighty Girl, Godwin’s Law is in effect. We made it to post number 58 before the Nazi mention though, so kudos kids. Also, I love conversations like this because it’s fun to see all the doctors and scientists come out of the woodwork. Hi, guys!

OK, now for a palate cleanser. Every time I do one of these videos, people ask how I got my hair that way. I’ve ignored it, because I do have curly hair, but you know when people keep asking about your hair through the Nazi comments, it’s time to pony up. So here’s what I do:

-I wash it with Burt’s Bees Pomegranite and Soy Shampoo.
-I condition with the Costco bottle of Paul Mitchell for dry hair.
-I towel dry, and comb it with a wide-tooth comb.
-While it’s wet, I scrunch in some type of curly product like: Curl Friends Replenish Leave in Conditioner, TIGI Catwalk Curls Rock Amplifier, or lately DevaCurl B’Leave-In, which was recommended by the lovely Sarah Brown.
-Once it air dries, I scrunch in John Frieda Secret Weapon to make the curls less frizzy and smooth flyaways.
-If I’m going to be on camera or it’s a special occasion, I take the remaining frizzy bits and use three or four medium sized rollers to tame them. I like the Conair Hot Sticks because they make curls that look like the rest of my curls.

Voila! Tomorrow, we’ll discuss Obama’s stimulus package and my awesome new lipstick.

Plinky

Have you heard about Plinky yet? It launched yesterday, and you might want to go grab your preferred user name before it’s gone.

Plinky gives you a new question to answer every day, and lets you friend people and compare answers with them, sort of like you can on Facebook or Twitter. You can favorite other people’s answers, and publish your own answers to your blog (or your Twitter feed), and so forth. If you’re already blogging, it’s a nice way to supplement and to help your readership grow. If you’re not, it’s a less work-intensive way to connect with friends. I’m an advisor to the company, and I’m excited about it, so I’ll be posting my answers to Plinky prompts here in the next few weeks. Go have a look, and let me know what you think.

Optimizing

In an effort to eliminate my mystery hives, which are apparently not allergic reactions, I am off to have a very nice acupuncturist stick needles in me. These are tiny needles. Hair thin needles, I am told. Needles so small they hardly even qualify as needles, you see. So why call them needles then? Why not call them something less panic-inducing? Stupids.

Fun Fact! Tongue goo is a part of the diagnosis process in Chinese medicine. Therefore, I was not supposed to brush my tongue this morning, which is counter-intuitive when you wake up and it tastes like something died in your mouth.

The end.