Archive for January, 2005

Scenario: A woman tells her friend why she had to dump the guy.
“The big irony is that I was there first, I was ready, and he pushed me away. Then he was like, ‘I love you… I love the smell of you.’ I felt this huge responsibility. Like, ohmigod this person loves me this much. […]

The Morning News is holding its first annual tournament of books, and I’m one of the judges. Tune in to see whose book is awarded the coveted Rooster.

I did another At Auction piece for the New York Times, “Warm Cookies Baked for Cold, Hard Cash.” Please go read it.

Two-Headed Calf
“Is it a boy? Is it a girl? It may be both. This auction is for a genuine real two headed baby calf. Died shortly after birth and owner had it mounted. Was taken to taxidermist who confirmed it was authentic. You can’t get this at Walmart.”
Jesus M&M (as seen on CNN)
“While at work […]

This woman on the sidewalk has two black eyes. A large butterfly bandage bridges her nose, extends up over her eyebrows, and reaches down near the corners of her mouth. I smile at her. She gives me an exaggerated apologetic look, as though she’s offended me by passing.

I adore this project. You take photos of the people in your neighborhood holding signs that have the lyrics to the “Sesame Street” song. Heather and Derek did a great one.

AHHHHHHH! My new favorite thing is Uncle Liam’s theme song for the Baby Arlo Show. It is riotous. Go watch it now. Uncle Liam needs his own kids’ show.

The woman across the street runs a daycare in her living room. As parents drop their kids off, she keeps the kids from crying by marching around the living room band-leader style. The toddlers clap enthusiastically from their shared playpen.
When the song is nearing its end, the little blonde boy always bends over, sticking […]

Scenario: The hostess at the neighborhood breakfast cafe is a very animated sort. While we speculate as to whether she is coked up at 10 a.m., she begins to chat with a couple from out of town. They are waiting for a table. This is a brief snippet of the 15-minute conversation they had until […]

I read somewhere that when you catch yourself in a behavior you’re trying to break, you should ask yourself, “Am I helping myself right now, or hurting myself?” I’ve found it increasingly easy to change course once I’ve agreed that what I’m doing is destructive. It makes me feel protective. Like, How could I […]