Engaging

Me: Where are we going?

Him: We’re going for a toast.

Me: Where?

Him: Up here.

Drives into a dark little park at the top of a hill. Man in bushes crouches down as we enter the lot.

Me: Did you see that guy?

Him: What?

Me: That guy who hid when we drove in.

Him: Nope.

Me: He’s right back there.

Him: Huh. Let’s go.

Me: I’m not getting out of the car, there’s a psycho hiding in the bushes.

Him: Come on!

Me: No way! He’s seriously lying in wait for someone to rape.

Him: Let’s go!

Me: No!

Him: Come on. It’ll be fine.

Me: Do you have a pocketknife or anything?

(He closes the car door and heads out. I open the glove compartment and search for a weapon.)

And that’s why I had a pair of scissors in my pocket when he proposed.