The shirt touches his neck
And smooths over his back.
It slides down his sides.
It even goes below his beltï¿½
down into his pants.
The dog has cleaned his bowl
and his reward is a biscuit,
which I put in his mouth
like a priest offering the host.
I can’t bear that trusting face!
He asks for bread, expects
bread, and I in my power
might have given him a stone.
And Tom in love is an absolutely sickening sight. Like if you go on a double date with him, which I did once, you put your date in the car, get into the driver’s seat, and wait three and a half minutes for Tom and what’s her face to make out and debate who sits on what side in Lady and the Tramp voices. This is all very strange to a guy whose idea of romance is saying “you wanna be on top or on the bottom?”
Yesterday at lunch, a friend pointed out that I’d packed my peanut butter and jelly sandwich and fishy crackers in a Sephora bag. Perhaps he thought it was sort of like wearing pigtails and spike heels, or affixing a Big Bird sticker to the bumper of your Porsche. To be fair, red lipstick and Jiffy are a tough combo, but I like to think I can work the look. The look being peanut butter and red lipstick all over my chin.
When I was in college, my geology professor told us about Lake Nyos, which had formed in a volcano crater in Cameroon, West Africa. The volcano continually released carbon dioxide into the water, and in 1986 the lake flipped over. The CO2 came to the surface, rushed down into the valley, and suffocated 1700 people.
Neat project alert:
Q7A (One question, seven answers) is a brand new site. Each week there’s a new question this week, it’s “What are you wearing?” and readers get a chance to answer via email. Seven of the best answers appear the following week. Similar to what Sippey.com used to do with his occasional random question, but more structured. The site is just getting started, so send some answers in to help out, or check back in a few weeks to see what’s up.
Everywhere I went this morning, they were in front of me. The girl who tried to run her obviously damaged FastPass through the electronic reader (eight times), the woman who decided to rummage through her handbag at the top of the escalator, the man obliviously reading his book in front of the bus door when there were plenty of empty seats. Wherever it is I’m going in life, stupid people are in the lead.
I’m about to give a gratuitous plug, so if you don’t want to see me whore myself, cover your eyes. Still here? Blogger, the free and fabulous Web tool I use to post to my site, is up for a Webby award. Though the Webby people have inexplicably placed Blogger in the Personal Site category (beh?), I still think you should give them a vote. Good service, I like all the people who got it going, and its helped a lot of people take up online journals. Also, check out all the other sites up for awards. Good way to build a knowledge base about some of the cool stuff online without having to do the actual surfing. Go forth!
This morning I saw a shiny penny, head side up, winking in the sun all movie-like. “Pick me up,” it beckoned in its little Abe Lincoln voice. “All the day you’ll have good luck!” But I just left it there. Something’s gonna fall on my head.
Conversations with my nephew, Part II:
Me: Baby, can you hand me your shoe?
Trevor: I not a baby anymore! I a little tiny big boy!