Famous among dozens
Kate 1 has been trying on wedding dresses: An actual, living person just told me that this bra doesn’t hold my boobs high enough.
Kate 2 had an Amelie moment: Today I got real, honest gratification from peeling a Clemintine orange.
5:07 p.m.
GOOD WORD
Weltschmerz
The unhappiness of eternal disappointment in life as it is.
5:07 p.m.
FOR EXAMPLE
I was looking into the nuances of semicolon usage when I came across this gem in the Chicago Manual of Style, 14th edition, section 5.90:
“Mittelbach had forgotten his reeds; hence he was prevented from jamming with the others.”
5:16 p.m.
MIDDLE AMERICAN GOODNESS
This weekend, I watched a documentary on the square dancing and clogging national championships. The voiceover narrative was priceless, “Dance Explosion has cause for concern. The Southern Belles are dancing so well, it’s almost supernatural.” Afterward a Lawnmower race came on.
Also, loved the “60 Minutes” segment on Thomas Kincaid, “painter of light.” Collector: “We have the wall of cottages and the wall of inspiration… ‘Petals of Hope,’ that’s one of my favorites.”
5:10 p.m.
WEB WISDOM
From Bucolic Front: “often i will talk about dealing with people in crisis or tumultuous relationship strife or any other variety of disturbance, and how strange it is to be around crazy people and how careful you have to be not to get any on you”
And Jeri also makes a good point: “Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn’t there the first time you need him, chances are you won’t be needing him again.”
11:35 a.m.
SAFETY FEATURES
The 11.15.01 strip from Gimme Back My God was a good one, “This SUV comes equipped with many safety features. Which is good because if you’re in an accident, you’ll want to be in peak physical health as you gloat over the broken bodies of your victims.”
BRING IT, GOOGLE
Someone just arrived at my site by searching for “erotic oktoberfest.” I want that to happen a lot more. Erotic Oktoberfest, Erotic Oktoberfest, Erotic Oktoberfest.
11:08 a.m.
EMAIL MOMENT!
From:Intrepid reporter friend.
Subject: Editorial Integrity
Excerpt:
“As you may have heard, Mark told some brilliant lies and almost got me a job, but the facade cracked when his boss asked this pointed (and loaded) question: “Do you even know what newspapers do?” I mean, how are you supposed to answer that? Apparently, not with “no.” So, providentially (which means “and then Fate/Satan played another cruel joke”), the building trade magazine I was freelancing for offered me a full-time job. They have a new Editor-in-Chief (third one in the same year — how’s THAT for job security), and she’s got grand visions about making it a “real” magazine. Bless her heart. She’s still fighting the good fight. Today, a guy from advertising came in and said, “Can you do a story on this roofing manufacturer? They just bought an ad,” and she replied, “We don’t do that anymore,” and stared him down. Wow. She’s going to get fired real soon.”
11:55 a.m.
NOE VALLEY MOMENT
Sign in a shop window on my walk home: “Interested in cheese classes? Inquire within!!!” And the sad truth? I’m totally interested in cheese classes.
5:12 p.m.
FUN WITH CRAIGSLIST
Creepy missed connections ad on Craigslist:
” Do you live above the AMC theaters on Van Ness? (Across the street) Can you see me looking at you? Just WAVE…”
Enchanting, no? Especially that last bit, with the insistent “WAVE” in all upper caps. Who writes something like that expecting to get a date? “What’s that you say, delightful thing? You’ve been watching me? Well, how quaint. I don’t even know you, and you’ve already seen me naked. Rather amusing when you think about it. It really is so difficult to meet new people in the City, what with all the crazies about. Do come over for coffee.”
In other news, a smashingly titled event from the entertainment section:
11/17-18: womens art faire this weekend 17th & 18th: ‘OVARIA’ (emeryville)
11:45 a.m.
STICKS AND STONES
Jason posted this link to a list of phobias. I lost about half an hour to it. There’s a fear for everything (panophobia). I’ve categorized a few of the better ones.
Fears that amuse me:
Fears that make a lot of sense:
Fears that have applied to me at one time or another:
What-the-hell fears:
Sucks-to-be-you fears:
Good-luck-with-that fears:
But my favorite fear of all time is hippopotomonstrososesquipedaliophobia. Fear of long words.
3:25 p.m.
SNAKES AND SNAILS
Henry is a 4 year old with the meanest blog around. Makes me misty for my babysitting days. Some excerpts:
We pulled the turkey out of the oven and set it on the table. Henry stared at it for a while in amazement.
Then he looked up at me and asked, “Is it a baby?!?”“What’s Pikachu turn into?”
“Raichu.”
“What’s Psyduck turn into?”
“Golduck.”
“What’s Charmander turn into?”
“Charmeleon.”
“What’s Henry turn into? Henry turn into Daddy?”
“Aim a little higher, son.”
On a beautiful Sunday afternoon we walked up the street to the ice cream store. Sun was out. Birds were singing. Neighbors waving as they swept their stoops. Henry screaming at the top of his lungs.
“No. Sleep. ‘Til Broooooklyyyyn!!”
We’re impressionable.
Pound for pound, Henry might actually be the most powerful entity in the Western United States.
P.S. We are running out of babysitters.
During a routine shopping trip to Walgreen’s yesterday Henry started screaming that he wanted some chocolate money.
We were walking by the Gold Circle Coin Condom display when he started screaming it.
Ocean Beach.
Henry wrote his name in the sand, admired it proudly then very carefully erased it and walked away.
“Why’d you erase your name son?”
“Didn’t want anybody to step on it, Dad.”
Tracey and Henry went on a school trip to the pumpkin patch last week.
On the way home he says, “When pumpkins wanna communicate they turn into jack-o-lanterns.”
I just taught Henry to say, “I like small Asian girls.”
I’d like to apologize. I was bored and it seemed like the right thing to do at the time.
(I’m documenting this purely for future therapy reference.)
11:24 p.m.
CLARIFICATIONS
From Signal vs. Noise:
“Steep Tea fortune of the day: When I said I can see myself with someone like you I meant like you, but not you.”
10:14 a.m.
Mighty Girl 