Wit, Rapier-Like

categories, My Life

Two things Alice said:

1. “Did you see Match Point? The weird thing about Woody Allen is that he’s been doing the same thing his whole life, and obviously has no desire to learn anything about any other profession. So he doesn’t research what he’s writing about. It’ll be a business situation and the characters will be like, ‘Do you business? I also business! I engage at business in an extremely businesslike manner.'”

2. (Reading from a magazine cover) Does He Like You on Top?
“You turn to the article and it’s a two-page spread that just says, ‘Yes.'”

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9 thoughts on “Wit, Rapier-Like”

  2. Call me shallow, juvenile and tacky, but two things I don’t want to see on the same screen: “Woody Allen” and “Does he like you on top?”

    Ewww.

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  3. I’m glad I’m not the only person who thought that about Match Point…

    to point 2. I totally like laughed audibly.

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  4. At least Woody stopped using Diane Keaton, an actress who has only played one character over and over.

    2. He likes you pretty much any way he can get you, I think.

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  6. She got pulled over because I was fucking up her driving with my incessant wit. OBVIOUSLY.

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  7. I remember seeing a People Magazine cover back in 1999 that said “Travis Tritt: I Sing To My Unborn Son Every Night!” and thinking “what more could there possibly be to that story?”

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  8. Hubby Bryan and I have a hate for Woody Allen that we generally don’t talk about in public because the elite beat us with their umbrellas. So #1 makes no sense to me other than the fact that I hate Woody Allen.

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