Overheard: Lessons on the Five

1st March 2006

Hat Guy is on the bus today, and he’s feeling preachy. It’s the noon bus, so most of the people on board are tourists headed into the city for a day of shopping. Hat Guy is making them gravely uncomfortable, which seems to make Hat Guy happy. Here, a sampling of his insights:

On Poverty

The problem is, we got too many folks addicted to sleeping under the sky. Addicted. And then we offer them these itty bitty shelters. Let me ask you something. If you’ve got a great big house, why you gonna trade that for a little small house? Right?

On Marriage

Paul said, if you’re a man, and you’re hot to trot, you should get married. He didn’t put any conditions on that. He didn’t say, only to a woman! You have to marry a woman! No! He said, get married. And that’s the end of that.

On Religion

Bring out the religious stuff and the crowd goes dead.

On Travel

And for those of you who are tourists, this is San Francisco. You come here, you expect to have your mind blown wide open.

On Civil Rights

Does anyone think they might need an attorney in the next couple of minutes?