I have been asleep for two days. That is, except for the five minutes I spent gasping in terror when my nose-phlegm met my lung-phlegm, thereby creating a perfect storm of suffocation.

But, anyway, how are you?

I’d hoped to give you more up-to-the-moment reports from SxSW, but because I was dulled by a potent mix of Dayquil and Bloody Marys, I didn’t do much. Among the things I didn’t do:

– I did not charm Jason Kottke into sarcastically calling his fianc�e Yoko.

– I did not start an intriguing new photo project.

– I did not play air guitar to Aerosmith power ballads.

– I did not give the Threadless guys noogies.

– When I waited an hour for a thimble of box-Chardonnay at the Frog Design Party, whilst the show-choir-duet band played TV show theme songs, I did not punch the lead singer in the teeth.

But only because I lacked the energy, my friends. Never the will.

Next year, I plan to wear a pink cowboy hat and hot pants, and swig tequila from the bottle while I dance flamenco on the bar with Ben Trott. Ben looks awesome in hot pants.

Are you going to SxSW? Hey, me too!

If you’re not busy waking up in an unfamiliar hotel room, you should come say hi. I’m moderating a panel with the guys from Threadless at 3:30 p.m. on Monday. And who doesn’t love to engage in friendly conversation about user-driven business models?