Category: categories

Ack! I love the “12 Galaxies United in Protest” guy! For those of you who didn’t know who I was talking about awhile back, here’s a site devoted to him that Mr.Kottke tracked down.

4:19 p.m.

Found this fantastic email on a bowling newsgroup. It was a search engine thing, don’t ask:

Kathleen,

Hi sorry it took me so long to get back to you. I would love to se some of
your cross stitch patterns. I am always looking for new project for the
house or the kids. I am finishing one for the bathroom right now and do a
lot for the kids rooms and little Christmas project and stuff. Bowling takes
up a lot of time and so do the kids but I try to get everything in. Anyway,
if you have a scanner and want to EMail them to me that would be great if not
we can do it another way.

Thanks Again,

Sharon

12:18 a.m.

When I’m really tired, my contacts grow fur to keep my eyes warm. Ug.

10:18 a.m.

Stuff that creeps me out (second in a series):

  • This post from wrong answer: Walking back to the office from lunch this past week, I stepped on a hypodermic needle. Well, I stepped on the rig, not the needle part – thank god. It is things like this that make me think it might be time to leave the big city.
  • The guy whose outhouse floor collapsed, he fell in and had to hang there for three days until the mailman found him.
  • This woman walked around with a knife in her neck for a few hours, and nobody noticed.

1:53 p.m.

Things I never remember:

  • Your birthday.
  • The Alamo
  • My past lives.
  • That time when.
  • Where I put my glasses.
  • My manners.
  • The Maine.

10:44 a.m.

EMAIL MOMENT!

Scenario:

A friend who wants to start crashing more dot-com parties.

Excerpt:

Dot-com parties rule! Ok, so I’ve
only been to one, but it ruled! Ok, it was the most
homogenous party I’ve ever been to but it was oddly
comforting! And they played Pump Up the Jam!

1:55 p.m.

You always know something cool has died when your parents get into it. “Oh, Margaret, I bought that rap album by the blond boy named after the candy? M and M? Anyway, I love it. Just love it. ‘I am Slim Shady, yes I am the REAL shady!’ ” Along those lines, yesterday I saw a Burning Man symbol painted on the side of a … Jeep Grand Cherokee.

12:15 p.m.

Let’s play the “worst way to die” game for a second. Acid bath, wheat thresher, slow consumption by hungry caged lions. (Stolen from Peex. )

9:55 a.m.

Most of you have probably seen this, I’ve gotten about five copies, but the photo is so worthwhile. Someone found a fried chicken head in their McNuggets.

12:18 p.m.

Kim Addonizio’s letter-perfect description of love:

“It’s the timbre of someone’s voice, the shape of their hands, the way they open a grapefruit or turn toward something that captures their attention. It’s the scar and the history of the scar, the pattern of small moles scattered on the forearm or belly, the words said or not said in love making, the individual, the unmistakable impress of that mouth and not another.”

3:53 p.m.

San Francisco moment:

Guy on the street wearing the head of a kid’s tiger costume as a hood, complete with ears. No one looks twice. God, I love this town.

12:02 p.m.

The Myrtle Beach Fire Department plans to return a large donation they received at a recent ham rubbing. But this wasn’t just any ham rubbing, this was the Fourth Annual Ham Rubbing (all caps) at which “women danced on stage while having their bare chests rubbed with a ham. ” Now that’s entertainment once you get that pesky gag reflex under control, anyway.

2:30 p.m.

People I wish I knew:

The guy on the train who had a patch sewn onto his jacket sleeve that read, “Missouri is for lovers.” He also had a piece of material pinned to the back of his sweatshirt hood that said, “nomeansno.”

9:54 a.m.

The photo that goes with this article is worth the link. Freekay. Seems that during WWII, a Nazi sympathizer planted a bunch of trees in the shape of a
swastika. It’s only visible from the sky when the leaves change in autumn, but they’re still cutting it down.

2:07 p.m.

I’d be willing to bet that when most people let their minds wander, they think of something more interesting than:

Labor-Intensive Unshelled Legumes: A Short List

  • Brazil Nuts
  • Pumpkin seeds
  • Pine Nuts
  • Sunflower Seeds

My computer has SETI. What I need is a project that harnesses my brain’s unused resources for the good of humanity. Perhaps I could power a very small light bulb or something. How ’bout it, science?

11:54 a.m.

Your Mom portal. My favorite jokes are in the “Math” section:

public boolean whore(String x) { if (x = “Your Mom”) { return true; } else { return false; }

9:51 a.m.

Are things really this bad in SF? Do guys with IQs high enough to code software need a guide that tells them how to approach a woman at a networking party? Um… you’re networking, it’s a party. Try “So, what do you do?” This is not rocket science, my friends. Then again, this article did have an brilliant piece of general advice for men on the prowl:

“Take a look at some of the spreads in Details. Do
you look like that? No? Get yourself down to the
Castro or whatever gay district exists in your
town, march into the most fashionable and snooty
clothing store you find and demand that a gay
male employee find an outfit for you. ”

11:07 a.m.

Someone gave me some “Tea Leaf Soap” as a gift awhile back. I finally opened it when I ran out of regular soap and used it this morning. It’s a pretty deep green with little brown tea leaves embedded in it, and it smells nice. Of course, I was covered with little brown tea leaves when I finished washing. When I mentioned to a friend that a debris-laden soap seemed counter productive, she looked at me incredulously, as though I’d missed an entire chapter in the girl handbook. “Rinse it off,” she said. Oh. Right.

11:07 a.m.