LADIES NIGHT EXCERPTS
Lady 1: Tell them about what you got John for Christmas. I think this is funny.
Lady 2: What?
Lady 1: Jane and I went Christmas shopping and she bought lacy undies for herself as John’s Christmas present.
Lady 3: Sweet.
Lady 1: I think it’s cute.
Lady 3: What do they look like?
Lady 2: (Describes skimpies.) My starvation diet starts tomorrow.
Lady 4: Hence, the fat-free fudgecicles.
Lady 5: The fudgicles are fat free?
Lady 2: Yep.
Lady 5: Oh man! How could you do that to us?
Lady 2: They’re really good.
Lady 5: So close…yet so far. Well, I guess we could always dip them in frosting.
Lady 6: I think I’ve got some Magic Shell somewhere.
(Highlight of a short sanitary products discussion:)
Lady 1: Someone once said that removing a tampon is like pulling a dead, wet mouse out of a wine bottle by its tail.
Lady 1: Dead on though.
Lady 2: Yeah. Pretty much.