18th April 2001

My credit card company gave me an unsolicited increase. As you might imagine, my first thought was, Money? What the hell am I supposed to do with more money? Fortunately, they enclosed an informative brochure entitled, What to do With a Credit Card Increase. Apparently, when your credit line exceeds your annual income, you should take a Princess Cruise and order a digital watch that tells time in 20 different countries at once.

1:35 p.m.