I have now been humming Janet Jackson’s “Rhythm Nation” for 24 (waking) hours. I am near the breaking point. If my self-destruct feature kicks in and I stop posting suddenly, blame Janet (Miss Jackson, if you’re nasty).

1:37 p.m.

Annie articulates the new feminist battle cry:

“Somehow, just somehow, I must stop Jennifer Love Hewitt.”

10:40 a.m.