Mighty Life List
May 10 2017

Let’s Help this Woman Make Her Movie

bexyow

Did you ever want someone to succeed so badly that you get chills thinking about it? Rebecca is making a movie, and I want this for her. I want it so much my eyes are welling as I type.

Bex and I met almost a decade ago through the Internet, filming Momversation videos together. Remember those?

momversationbexme

I still cringe a little about that name, but neither of us was gonna turn down a pay check. Plus, those cheesy pre-taped conversations about post-baby bodies and keeping marriage spicy brought me one of my dearest friends.

rebelbex

When Bex graduated high school, she was already a writer. She worked for the Chicken Soup series, specifically Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul, and she already knew words were her thing. She was raised to be strong and independent, and it took. She told her very educated family that she wasn’t going to college. This went over well, as you might imagine, but Bex had a wild streak and wanted to get started on her life.

She was writing! She was wild! She was pregnant.

bexhalgolden

A baby was not part of the plan, but Bex and her not-boyfriend Hal made a new plan. They married at a drive-thru chapel in Las Vegas, just in time for their son Archer’s arrival.

dapperarcher

archerthethinker

Archer is an old soul, sweet and chill, with a head full of thoughts beyond his years.

A few years later, Fable was born with Rebecca’s eyes and artistic sensibility.

fablebaby

Fable promptly covered herself in Elmer’s Glue and pen marks, and began hoarding decorative paper and stick-on gems.

fablerainbow

Bex and I became friends when she was in her twenties, sharing rooms at conferences and smoking a single cigarette on the balcony at night.

mebexmadwomen

We’ve sat on stoops in New York, jumped on hotel beds in Salt Lake City, clinked plastic cups of free wine in Florida.

madonnainnrobetastic

She met me in Austin when I was newly divorced, patted my back and told me to get laid.

bexruthreateningme

We eventually met each others’ families, and introduced our kids. A couple years after Fable was born Bex and Hal thought a third baby wouldn’t be a bad idea. I was boarding a plane when I read online that Bex was pregnant …with twins. The news hit me in the sternum. I called from the jetway.

“Twins. Fuck.”
“I am freaking out,” she said. “I am so scared.”
“Ok, girl. What do you need?”
“Money.”

So we talked about ways to get her more writing gigs, to get paid better, to get her on some campaigns.

bexwithchilds

Boheme and Reverie arrived just as Bex turned thirty, one with a head of blond curls, the other with a dark shag of Muppet hair.

bexrevvieboergo

Bo’s trust is hard earned, and her brain shines right out her eyes. Revvie is all nurture and encouragement.

borevvienutshell

Just like their mom.

Rebecca’s already impressive hustle shifted to high gear. As a mother of four, I have rarely seen her rest.

Through it all — sleepless nights, epic tantrums, the sheer logistical bullshit of getting four kids to all the places on time — Bex was writing a screenplay.

I didn’t know this until it was almost done.

fabletothefront

Most mothers who write have no time for unpaid work. You find it at unholy hours. You settle in to the keyboard at 3 a.m., because you’re pregnant with twins and there’s not enough room in your own skin. You’re awake at 1 a.m. because you had five cups of coffee to get through laundry, and homework, and peanut butter sandwiches, and bedtime stories for four. So you find a pen and hope you’ll get two or three hours of sleep before your kids wake with the sun.

The projects pulled from quiet, bone-weary moments are private — too fragile to bear scrutiny. So I was surprised, and humbled, when Bex told me she’d been working on a script. I asked if I could read it when she was done.

“Do you really want to?”
“What? Totally.”

familygolden

A few months later, we were leaving from a family visit. I had a twin clinging to each of my legs when Bex beckoned me to the desk in her guest room. Next to a cork board covered in pages from old Sassy magazines, she handed me her screenplay.

It seemed like a miracle. How?

gobexgo

But there it was, 110 pages warm from the home printer. Two years later, I’m still in awe.

CHANGING THE RATIO

“In 2014, 85% of films had no female directors, 80% had no female writers, 33% had no female producers, 78% had no female editors, and 92% had no female cinematographers.” (source)

This movie is Rebecca’s purpose, the thing that kept her up working in the dark while her babies slept. And right now, she’s filming it.

Rebecca’s movie is a reimagining of Peter Pan, set in the modern era and narrated from Wendy’s perspective. In PANS, “Wendy reclaims her power after being stripped of it by an assaulter and her female community who don’t believe her side of the story.”

I'M NOT SORRY — PansMovie.com from Rebecca Woolf on Vimeo.

As Bex puts it euphemistically on her Kickstarter page, “Raising money to fund a film about teenage girls rebelling against the nuances of rape culture is a bit of a challenge.” Ha.

But Bex is making it go. And she is freaking out. And she is scared.

“Ok, girl. What do you need?”
“Money.”

KICKSTARTER

The PANS Kickstarter is an all-or-nothing campaign. That means, if Bex fails to raise $100K, she gets none of the $37,000 that has already been offered. Which makes me feel a little like throwing up.

Last night, a film backer offered to donate $5,000 if we can bring in 100 new backers by Friday evening.

I know a lot of you have read Rebecca’s site. If she’s ever made you laugh or tear up or think, now is the right time to send some gratitude back her way.

pansrebeccawoolf

Bex needs $63,000 more to pay the actors, the crew, everyone working to make this movie real. So here’s how we can help:

• Fund Rebecca’s Kickstarter, because money is power and women need more of both
• Help change the ratio in film by telling your people about the PANS Kickstarter on YouTube, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, whatever you got.
• Maybe hit the thumbs up on Pan’s Facebook page if you want to keep up

Let’s do this. Let’s listen to each other, and help each other be heard.

bexmaggiedingding

I love you Bex. Ride or die.

PANS Kickstarter Campaign,
Girls Gone Child, Rebecca’s site
Rebecca’s Instagram
Pan’s Instagram
Rebecca Woolf’s Feminist Take on Peter Pan Hopes for Greenlight via Kickstarter

UPDATE: What the what? Huge thanks to those of you who have donated so far! With your help, Bex met the goal of 100 new supporters within a few hours. So quickly that the film backer offered an additional $5K if she can make it to 700 supporters by end of day today (Friday, May 12). This level of interest gives PANS a huge boost in the film community. More lady writers, producers, directors! The shift is starting, because of you. Thank you so much.

May 5 2017

Fridaaaay! Links

doxxielady

Happy weekend, nice people. What are you up to? Hank’s baseball team is in the playoffs (hooray, Hank’s team!), and a friend of ours organized a kid-friendly evening of s’mores. Doesn’t that sound cozy? Sunday is the Alameda Flea, which we may actually skip because I think we’re at stuff-capacity. But they have Kettle Corn there, so don’t hold me to it. Here are some links for you to click on:

I am a Tinder Guy Holding a Fish and I Will Provide for You

Two things via Ashley C. Ford, who you should follow on the Twitters:
– This brief video of Kim Cattrall made my eyes water with discomfort.
– And what it would sound like if Michael Jackson recorded trap music

An update on yesterday’s post: Because of you, Rebecca met her grant challenge

This toddler suit is the best.

The blushing nail trend is pretty.

Photoshopping heads from old masters’ paintings and Disney princesses onto photos of regular people. (Thanks, Tess!)

PoopQuest — your stool diary is a weirdly pretty and charming app, and just the ticket if you have a toddler with a scatologic obsession.

Flat-chested rich ladies, I have found another bikini for you!

What are you thinking about, little duck?

May 4 2017

The Most Interesting Thing in the World

I came across a good guiding question recently in Career Advice for Undergrads. It’s a succinct way to put something I think about a lot:

“First, what is the most interesting thing going on in the world right now? Second, how can I put myself at the center of that?”

Isn’t that good? I so want to know what fascinates you right now. I’ll go first.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about how our workforce is being changed by robots. I wonder how can we best evolve as a world community when robots can do most of our heavy lifting.

This is already happening, obviously. Robots have taken over lots of the old assembly jobs, even lots of the new customer service work that used to be done by phone banks.

So how can we be sure everyone has meaningful work so all of us are fed, have clean water, have access to education, and feel included in society? We need to re-train our workforce so we use the things about us that are uniquely human. It seems like we can create engaging work for people, work that could bring us up a step or two on Maslow’s Hierarchy and raise our global well being, but it’s such a huge undertaking.

I also think about the dark side of this, specifically whether we’ve been too radical about using drones and other tech to sanitize war, thereby making peace a less palatable option. Blurft.

OK, your turn. What’s the most interesting thing in the world right now? It doesn’t have to be a big deal to anyone else, maybe just an artist who’s blowing your mind, or a field you want to know more about. I’m more curious about the quirky individuality of it. I am also game to talk more about robots. Your call.

Apr 28 2017

Fridaaaay, Links!

SissyandStars

Let’s all live in Muji Huts and have tea together in the yard.

Have you used the new Pinterest-like feature on Instagram? It lets you categorize your Instagram bookmarks into boards. They’re private for now, but I assume the option to make them public is coming.

Pretty disposable water bottle design.

5 Ways to Teach Kids About Consent is simple, useful parenting advice.

“The 25 Most Useful French Phrases I Learned While Studying in France”

Sweet gift for a writer.

Jimmy Fallon hosted some robots on The Tonight Show. Sophia at 2:30 is chilling and magical. via Laughing Squid

Good tool if you’re feeling anxious: The Catastrophe Checklist (20-30 seconds)

Side eye at this coat that functions as an extra suitcase. The poor flight attendants who have to assess your threat level when you’re walking like you have a bunch of electronic equipment inside your clothes. Nope.

Who does this little girl grow up to be? Gah! Babies, you’re the best.

Apr 27 2017

Drone, Bye

Man takes drone out for a sunset flight, drone gets shot down

I read this article and did a slow clap for the shooter. As you know, I love a robot, and still the drone situation is beginning to chafe. Hear me out.

A few months ago we were staying at a hotel, and our room had an attached private patio surrounded by a high wall. Ozzy ran out into the patio after our bath, so I chased after him in my altogether because… private patio.

I’m standing in the silence for a minute waiting for Ozzy to finish playing with rocks, making sure he doesn’t shove one in his windpipe, when I notice this annoying whine. It’s sort of like a broken industrial fan, and the sound is getting louder and louder. Finally, I look up and see a creepy-ass photo drone hovering over naked me and my naked child.

Hear me, friends. If I’d had a BB-gun on hand, I’d have dropped that Minority Report Mosquito out of the sky like:

dronedrop

And then I would don a robe, gather the broken toaster pieces and pop them in the pool.

Sorry about that $3K, bro. Find another hobby.

Apr 25 2017

La Roche-Posay Anthelios Ultra-Light Facial Sunscreen

antheliossunscreen

Hello! This isn’t an ad, it’s a thing I use.

A few weeks ago, I told you about the face cream I’ve been using for years, and mentioned that I have a favorite sunscreen too.

This is it: La Roche-Posay Anthelios Ultra-Light Facial Sunscreen. I’ve been using it on my face, neck, chest, and hands for the past few years. As my girlfriends and I enter our 40s and 50s, we talk about how you can really see who has been wearing sunscreen and sun hats their whole lives — especially the white ladies, although everyone seems to get age spots and the like. I haven’t been militant about sunscreen until the last five years or so, but man, it’s kind of shocking the difference it made when I started applying religiously.

Why Anthelios is the best:

• It works. It doesn’t seem to require as much reapplication as other sunscreens. My age spots are fading, and I’m not picking up any new freckles, which has been a lifelong problem for me.
• It’s a watery liquid, so lightweight you can’t even feel it on your face and neck. You can get a sense of the texture at 2:37 in this video.
• It doesn’t have that overpowering sunscreen smell, and it also doesn’t smell “tropical.”
• It goes on matte.
• It absorbs almost instantly, and feels good under makeup.
• A little goes a long, long way.

Target carries it, but it’s a couple bucks cheaper on Amazon. It’s around $30 for a 2 oz bottle that goes and goes. So it’s not cheap, but again you don’t need much. I put it in the category of good makeup and preventative health stuff like vitamins. Protect your skin, healthy peoples!

If you have a sunscreen you’re devoted to, especially a whole-body one, I’d love to hear.

Apr 21 2017

Fridaaaaay, Links!

INDIO, CA - APRIL 16:  Festivalgoers attend Coachella Valley Music And Arts Festival at Empire Polo Club on April 16, 2017 in Indio, California.  (Photo by Katie Stratton/Getty Images for Coachella)
Photo by Katie Stratton

Roundup of the “most Coachella” outfits at this year’s festival. I particularly like the line of girls laughing mirthlessly and gazing into the middle distance.

Terrifying Glass Bottom Pool in Houston Lets You Swim 500 Feet Over the City Noooope.

I’m curious about these Moment iPhone Lenses. Supposedly they’re high quality telephoto, macro, and wide-angle lenses that mitigate the need to carry a huge DSLR. Which would be good because I keep taking my DSLR places and failing to remove it from my bag.

Did you hear that Taser is offering free body cameras to all U.S. Law Enforcement?

This video of the system for crossing the street at the Boston Marathon is efficiency porn.

Truth.

Army Guy gummies via Laughing Squid

A solar-powered device that pulls water from desert air.

My fully optimized life allows me ample time to optimize yours.

I got you something,
Maggie