Categories 
Feb
21
2008
BIG PLANS
Things I feel I should be doing more actively after reading this month’s O Magazine.
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Figuring out what I’d do if I only had five years to live.
Doing what comes naturally, reflexively, effortlessly
Switching to Yves meatless taco stuffers
Figuring out what I’d do if money weren’t an obstacle.
Pretending that I am smart enough not to be distracted by the Grecian tragedy unfolding for the Spears family.
Figuring out what my regrets would be if I died tomorrow.
Measuring out five ounces of liquid to see how many servings of wine our enormous wine glasses actually hold.
Designing my life to bring me joy.
Meditating on compassion.
Relaxing.
Damn, now I’m all stressed out!
Go with tofu tacos! Use a potato masher until it looks like ground chuck, heat it up in a frying pan with a little water and a ton of taco seasoning (Costco sells the McCormick in a giant container for about four bucks), and layer it over refried beans.
…uh, this comment brought to you by a vegetarian suddenly starving after the mention of Mexican food.
This list makes me hyperventilate. I need a paper bag. And possibly a list entitled “Things that Come Naturally, Reflexively, Effortlessly” – a list that negates everything on it just by existing.
O Magazine, you do present us with conundrums.
What about having fun? enjoying your family? buying bigger wine glasses?
I am not doing the wine thing…. no way.
All I know is the weeks I don’t wine I lose weight, that does not mean I will ever stop.
Drink wine…. I never w(h)ine
The wine thing is worth doing–just to have the image in your mind of a standard serving. Then I would skip to the relaxing part.
That 7th one about how many servings wine glasses hold is a moot point if you and a friend drank the whole bottle together during dinner last night, right?
Jules
House of Jules
this is one of the reasons i no longer subscribe. it stresses me out.
I need to design my life to bring me joy….
and laundry.
Just wanted to let you know that I’ve posted about your blog on my blog! I’ve listed you as one of my Top Ten Blogs!! Thanks for the good reading.
Nothing like Oprah or Martha Stewart to make me feel inadequate and underachieving.
I certainly don’t need to pay $20/yr subscription for it – I can do that all on my own, thankyouverymuch!
Ditto, Mar! Both Oprah and Martha make me like a like a big, fat loser.
Now I’m off to have some wine in my favorite red-wine bowl!
While we all love to dream of things we’d do if money weren’t an obstickle, I’d settle for somewhat less lofty goals:
-Not putting my foot in my mouth and wedging it sideways.
-Staying away from junk food.
-being kinder, gentler and more compassionate.
-Having Real Friends.
The meatless Yves is good. Try it in chili too.
When you figure out that Spears/Grecian Tragedy one, let me know. I cannot stop listening to the mind numbing celebrity news.
If you know how many servings are in your wine glass, then you can’t exclaim: “I don’t know what happened, I only had one glass!”
And, I’m a big fan of Morningstar Farms crumblers. Boca’s are pretty good, too. I mix up taco seasoning with chili powder, cumin, cayenne and a splash of water.
My Mom is not a vegetarian, but she’s been using crumblers in chili (I do, too). And my meat-loving Dad eats it!
Errrmmm… don’t the 1st and last on that list rather negate each other?
Actually, it seems to me that you are happy and doing just fine on your own. Let Oprah measure her own dang wine glasses and you just continue doing what you do rather well regardless.
I bought two cans of the Britney Spears
asparagus and put them in a salad. I thought they tasted okay, I had no idea they were from Greece. Has there been some sort of recall?
What a list! But largely I’d rather be focused on the positive ideas that O Magazine raises than the time-consuming, frustration-laden projects in Martha’s magazine – I swear each one shaves years off my life.
“Figuring out what I’d do if money weren’t an obstacle.”
I dunno about this one. I mean, you take the time, figure it out, and then get depressed about how you can’t afford it?
Things I’d do if money were no obstacle:
1. Operate a TV show for 30 years.
2. And a magazine for 10.
3. Buy 300 cocker spaniels and pretend they are my babies.
4. Then elect a president.
Yep, money rocks.
You know, I’m in the midst of the “joy” article and it’s making sense to me….that said, 5 ounces is about 5 ounces too few in my book.
That Yves meatless ground stuff is awesome. We make tacos out of it, put it in chili, put it on salad… an EXCELLENT substitute for meat!
“Pretending that I am smart enough not to be distracted by the Grecian tragedy unfolding for the Spears family.”
At least I can say I mostly just read headlines. But, yeah, this.
By the way, just read your book ‘No One Cares What You Had for Lunch’ and I loved it.
Five ounces of wine is considered a sip here in Cocktail Corner. I have no intention of measuring how much my glasses hold. I believe the lucite/summer/outdoor ones are 20-ouncers. I generally don’t remember much about the summer months. I contend it’s because they’re too short in New England. Just sayin’.
Dude, I am totally with you on the wine glass thing. I figured out once exactly how many calories *my* wine glasses can hold, as opposed to a serving of wine, and it made me sad indeed.
Yeah, I call that the Real Simple Effect.
The capacity of wine glasses is actually a fairly common topic in the wine blogs. Personally, I think it is overblown. After are, this is the Big Gulp, Biggie Size, Supersized culture.
Bossy has been striving to live her Best Life too — but so far has only mastered Napping.
Oh, and the wine thing? Bossy doesn’t have to measure to see that her stemware holds exactly one glass of wine! And that is very convenient because those bottles? There are almost two glasses of wine in each, right?
Seriously, bring on the NAP.
Wow, no pressure eh?
It seems if you subscribe to the second one, you can screw the rest…
Huh. Maybe pick one and call it a year?
Except for that Yves meatless one. I like how almost everyone has commented on that one since, you know, it’s actually possible. We’re not seeing anyone write in with, “Oh hey! Tried that ‘designing my life for joy’ thing and it was so greeaat! Mom tried it too–loved it!”
I guess it’s good we know our limits.
I am so happy to know that someone else feels this way about O. I have picked it up I don’t know how many times because of the tempting bylines on the cover and I am almost always disappointed by the short, vague articles and lack of useful information on HOW to achieve just about anything they advise or suggest for us ladies to make our lives more fulfilling and complete.
Just, THANK YOU!!
Wow. Heather, what a nice review! Your post got at exactly what I was trying to do and say with the book. Thank you so much.
As to Point One: See Point Two.
As to Point Two: See Points Eight, Nine, and Ten.
As to Point Three: Meatless Tacos?! ¿Por que?
As to Point Four: If you are trying to adhere to Points Two, Eight, Nine, and Ten, money should be a moot point. riches never made a sunset more breathtaking, nor will it make the smile on Hank’s face any more heartwarming. Consider that the subject of Point Five has far more money than any reasonable person should ever need and yet, …
As to Point Six: Giving any thought to Points Five and Seven would most likely be the biggest regrets one might have except spending to many hours at the office, and not trying to stick to Points Two, Eight, Nine, and Ten.
The hell with O and her suggestions. I never trust a person that lets Tom Cruise jump up and down on their couch, or has more dogs than hands to pet those dogs.
Is reflexively even a word?
Suddenly I feel very tired.
Those are beautiful holistic goals. I haven’t made it through the whole magazine yet, so thanks for your insight and speeding me ahead.
If you have time to read a magazine then I think I think your life is pretty sorted.
Grecian tragedy? What, is Britney prematurely gray now too?
This is hysterical. This is precisely why I don’t read O (or at least I tell people I don’t read it.) Do I honestly need monthly reminders of my failings? I think not.
How about adding “Figure out how to find the time to figure out all these things” to the list? Sheesh, Oprah. I try to only read O mag when I’m on an airplane headed off to vacation, because at least my mind’s already set on leaving reality completely for a spell. Ah, if only we all had an empire like hers…