Scenario: A pushy man gets on the bus with a cart too big for the aisle. He stands just next to the bus driver. The driver tells him to move, so he shuffles back about a foot and stands with his cart in front of an older woman. She expresses concern; he ignores her; she reiterates. All the dialogue below is hers:

You can’t stand here.

(Pause)

You’re in people’s way.

(Pause)

I said you’re in people’s way!

(The bus driver tells the man to find a place to sit down. The man shuffles back a bit more.)

(Victorious now.) You hear him? That’s it.

Keep movin’.

You’re doin’ fine.

Keeeeep movin’.

A: When I was a kid and we played imaginary games, I was always the boss. If we played house, I was the mom. Or if we played work, I was the boss. I was such a brat. I used to always fight with this one neighborhood kid over who got to be mom. Mark Smith, remember him?

M: Oh, yeah!

A: He came out of the closet a few years ago. His mom was crushed. The rest of us were like, “Surprise.”

M: Ha!

A: Really no one wanted to play Dad, except my little brother. Dad was so boring. We’d just give him a briefcase and say, “Go to work now.” And he’d have to march off into some back room and play by himself for awhile.

M: Oh! That’s sad.

A: Yeah, he’d leave for a minute and then come back and be like, “OK. Work’s over!” So he’d pretend to read the newspaper.

Great insight into comedy by Billy Connolly from an article in the New Yorker:

“It’s not because you’ve said something terribly funny; it’s because you’ve reminded them of something very bright in their lives, because you’re so passionate about telling them this tiny thing. It’s a girl you love, it’s fly-tying, it’s a banjo–all the things that make you want to dance.”

These photographs by Loretta Lux are more like paintings. They’re breathtaking. (via Superhero)

“If you ever get mauled by bears, I hope they stay away from your face, because I think you’re cute.”

Down load some Valentines.