Archive for August, 2002

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8.29.02 HOT, HOT, HOT.
Not so long ago, my roommate and I decided to clean out the fridge. We moved into a three-bedroom place within a few months of each other. Apparently, previous roommates had simply been leaving behind things they didn’t feel like moving out, or didn’t remember they owned. The fridge was no […]

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8.28.02 PRETTY PICTURES
My favorite mirror project gallery so far.

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8.27.02 COMMUTE
This morning, the bus smelled of fried prawns. The man next to me was sitting much too close. This made me want to push him. I ultimately decided against it.

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8.26.02 YOU CRAZY KIDS
I have now officially received eight emails explaining the origins of the phrase “I don’t give a tinker’s damn,” or alternately, “I don’t give a tinker’s dam.” Of these, three began with the phrases, “You might be surprised to learn,” “It might surprise you that,” and “Surprisingly enough.” I also received […]

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OUCH
Few things are more entertaining than a bright writer with a grudge and a fresh pen. In the June 2002 issue of GQ, Bob Drury writes of former George magazine editor Richard Blow’s memoir:
“What is certain is that Blow types faster than he can write.”

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8.21.02 GUY ON HIS CELL PHONE IN THE DELI
What are you talking about?�
No, no, I was totally involved. Totally�.
And she knows Voodoo.

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8.19.02 THREE PHRASES THAT I WOULD LIKE YOU TO USE MORE

To express dissatisfaction: “I don’t give a tinker’s damn.”
As a toast: “Here’s mud in your eye!”
To express approval: “He’s a tall, cool drink of water.”

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8.15.02 AT LONG LAST, VICTORY
I totally won the office picnic hula-hoop contest. Then I had a sno-cone.

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8.14.02 SHE GOT SAUCE
On meeting a girl who I can’t believe is still single:
Me: Hi, I don’t think we’ve met yet. I’m Maggie.
Her: Hi, I’m Kate.
(Conversation ensues.)
Kate: I’m sorry, what was your name again? I’m horrible with names.
Me: No problem, it’s Maggie. I don’t remember yours either.
Kate: Here, […]

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8.12.02 FOURTEEN GIRLS AND A BOTTLE OF RUM
I removed three pairs of boxer briefs from my purse this morning. The bachelorette went well. It is decidedly easier than I ever imagined to find a man who will remove his underwear on a public street. Many thanks to Rich, Jed, and John, all of whom […]