Ever since the Monica Lewinsky thing, I’ve occasionally seen this guy walking down Market Street with a sign that reads, “IMPEACH CLINTON.” It says some other stuff below, but I never bothered to read it. I figured the guy was just a political freak. Well, after several months passed and he was still around, I started to wonder why. This morning I read most of the rest of his sign before the bus moved along:

IMPEACH CLINTON

Nine Galaxies

United in protest.

1:04 p.m.

For all the guys who were feeling left out when I posted the fake nipple site, I present to you penisenvy.com:

“You can do something about your small penis! Are you tired of meeting attractive women only to find out they are into well hung guys? Are you
tired of women who don’t want anything smaller than 7 or 8 inches? Do you want to be hung like a
horse? Do you want to enlarge your penis? Well now you can.”

1:27 p.m.

I’m reading In the Skin of the Lion by Michael Ondaatje. I love this description of a girl rolling over:

“Clara turned slowly like something on the floor of the ocean.”

2:27 p.m.

Another Onion tribute:

William Safire Orders Two Whoppers
Junior

NEW YORK–Stopping for lunch at a
Manhattan Burger King, New York
Times ‘On Language’ columnist
William Safire ordered two “Whoppers
Junior” Monday. “A majority of Burger
King patrons operate under the
fallacious assumption that the plural is
‘Whopper Juniors,’” Safire told a
woman standing in line behind him.
“This, of course, is a grievous
grammatical blunder, akin to saying
‘passerbys’ or, worse yet, the dreaded
‘attorney generals.’” Last week, Safire
patronized a midtown Taco Bell,
ordering “two Big Beef Burritos
Supreme.”

4:00 p.m.

This article made me sad. It’s about people robbing hundreds of flowers at a time from a little park in San Francisco.

11:34 a.m.